King of the jungle, but maybe not the kitchen. What’s a lion’s favorite food? Roar-ing hot steak. He’s not a fan of the “well-done” pride.

Slow and steady wins the… eventually. A turtle was mugged by a group of snails. When the police asked for a description, he said, “I… Read More »The Turtle Race

Honey-sweet humor from the garden. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.

Mastering the art of winter preparation. My wife said I’m like a squirrel. I hide things in “safe places” and then spend the next three… Read More »The Squirrel Strategy

When your pet knows too much about your private life. I bought a talking parrot. Within two days, it learned how to mimic the sound… Read More »The Parrot’s Secret

Remembering everything, especially the embarrassing stuff. Why do elephants never forget? Because they don’t have a “delete” button on their trunk.

A bouncy hit for the Australian outback. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.

Solving the oldest question in history. Why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the opossum that it could actually be done.

Understanding life one wag at a time. My dog thinks I’m a god because I provide food. My cat thinks he’s a god because I… Read More »The Dog’s Philosophy

Tall tales from the savanna. What’s the worst thing about being a giraffe? Having to wait three hours for your coffee to reach your stomach.