54 Kids Jokes: The 2003 “Finding Nemo & Jack Sparrow” Edition

In 2003, the most important rule was “Just keep swimming.” It was the year of Holes, the launch of iTunes (99 cents a song!), and the era when everyone wanted a Beyblade that could spin forever. If you weren’t watching Star Wars: Clone Wars on Cartoon Network, you were probably trying to beat The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker.

The 2003 Top 10: The “Ocean & Adventure” Edition

1. The Finding Nemo Logic: Why did Nemo cross the road? To get to the “other tide.”
2. The Jack Sparrow Wit: Why is Captain Jack Sparrow so good at school? Because he’s great at “arrrr-ticulating” his answers.
3. The Beyoncé Fever: Why did the boy put a ring on his finger before the test? Because he heard Beyoncé say: “If you like it, then you shoulda put a ring on it” (and he really liked getting an A).
4. The Hulk Smash: Why did the Hulk go to the garden? Because he wanted to show off his “green thumb.”
5. The iTunes Launch: Why did the computer go to the Apple Store? To get some “fresh tunes” for 99 cents.
6. The Brother Bear Moment: Why don’t bears wear shoes? Because they like to go “bear-foot.”
7. The Spy Kids 3-D: Why did the kid wear 3D glasses to dinner? He wanted his vegetables to look “extra dimensional.”
8. The School of Rock: Why was the math book so loud? Because it was part of the “School of Rock” and had too many “heavy metal” problems.
9. The Terminator 3: Why did the robot go back in time? He forgot to say “I’ll be back” to his charger.
10. The Elf Holiday: Why did Buddy the Elf put syrup on his spaghetti? Because he heard it was one of the “four main food groups.”

The Full 2003 Kids Archive

11. What do you call a dinosaur that’s an expert at picking fruit? A “Berry-asaurus.”
12. Why did the laptop go to the doctor? It had a “bad case of the bytes.”
13. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
14. Why did the student eat his homework? Because his teacher said it was a piece of cake.
15. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
16. Why did the banana go to the nurse? It wasn’t peeling well.
17. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
18. Why did the math book look so sad? It had too many problems.
19. What do you call a dog that does magic? A Labracadabrador.
20. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
21. What do you call a pile of kittens? A mew-ntain.
22. Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
23. What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk.
24. Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field.
25. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
26. Why did the belt go to jail? It held up a pair of pants.
27. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.
28. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
29. What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A Zzz-rex.
30. Why did the music teacher need a ladder? To reach the high notes.
31. What do you call a cow in an earthquake? A milkshake.
32. Why did the spider get a job on the internet? He was a great web designer.
33. What do you call a duck that’s a firecracker? A fire-quacker.
34. Why did the man put a clock under his desk? He wanted to work over-time.
35. What do you call a cow that plays guitar? A moo-sician.
36. Why did the grape stop in the middle of the road? Because he ran out of juice.
37. What do you call a group of disorganized cats? A cat-astrophe.
38. Why did the kid throw the clock out the window? He wanted to see time fly.
39. What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? An irrelephant.
40. Why did the picture go to jail? It was framed.
41. What do you call a snowman with a sunburn? A puddle.
42. Why did the skeleton go to the dance? To rattle some bones.
43. What do you call a dog that can tell time? A watch dog.
44. Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
45. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.
46. Why did the boy put his money in the freezer? He wanted cold hard cash.
47. What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything? Tyrannosaurus Wrecks.
48. Why was the broom late? It over-swept.
49. What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backwards? A receding hare-line.
50. Why did the teacher wear sunglasses? Because her students were so bright.
51. What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pork chop.
52. Why are ghosts such bad liars? Because you can see right through them.
53. What do you call a pencil with two erasers? Pointless.
54. Why did the librarian get kicked off the plane? It was over-booked.