A guy walks into a bar and tries to play the counter like a plastic guitar. The bartender says, “Sir, if you want a drink, use your fingers to pay, not to hit colored buttons on a fake neck.”
Part of the 73 Bar Jokes: The 2005 “YouTube & How I Met Your Mother” Edition archive. Historically Verified
🔥 Top 10: The Bar Joke Archive: 1995–2025
2025 Classic: The Mars Colonial
A guy orders a drink and asks if it was brewed on the Red Planet...read more »
The Past Tense
Grammar humor for the more sophisticated drinker.The past, presen...read more »
The Termite Arrival
Construction humor for the local watering hole.A termite walks in...read more »
2025 Classic: The AI Proxy
A guy's personal AI bot walks into a bar and says, "My owner is ...read more »
The Helium Exit
A light-hearted hit that really floats.Helium walks into a bar an...read more »
The Skeleton Order
A spooky visitor with a very specific thirst.A skeleton walks int...read more »
The Grasshopper Surprise
When your name precedes your reputation.A grasshopper walks into ...read more »
The Sandwich Ban
When you bring your own lunch to the party.A sandwich walks into ...read more »
69 Bar Jokes: The 2003 “Finding Nemo & iTunes Store” Edition
In 2003, the bar was the place to be if you wanted to debate the ...read more »
2024 Classic: The Dark and Stormy
"The weather report for November."Part of the 58 Bar Jokes: The ...read more »
😜 More from category: The Bar Joke Archive: 1995–2025
2024 Legacy: The Sonic 3
A guy runs into the bar really fast and hits the wall.Part of th...read more »
2025 Legacy: The Retro-Human
A guy walks in and starts a conversation without checking his ph...read more »
2024 Archive: The Twitch Streamer
A guy brings a ring light and a microphone to the bar. "What's u...read more »
2025 Vintage: The Neuralink Slip
A guy walks in and the bartender immediately hands him a tequila...read more »
⏳ Time Capsule: This is how we rolled in the first two decades of the internet
This joke is more stable than Windows 95!
Pairing... Connected... Laughing!
Stuck in the middle with you... laughing.
Move it, football head! Let me read the joke!
One fine day with a woof and a purr... we laughed!
Searching multiple sites for jokes... found the best one here.
The layout of this joke is perfect. 10/10.
Go, go, go! More jokes!
At least I have chicken... and this joke!