A guy walks into a bar, orders a drink, and says, “I love you 3000.” The bartender says, “That’s nice, but your tab is only $15. Don’t make it weird, Tony.”
Part of the 54 Bar Jokes: The 2019 “Endgame & Joker” Edition archive. Historically Verified
🔥 Top 10: The Bar Joke Archive: 1995–2025
The Roman Drink
Ancient history meets the happy hour.A Roman walks into a bar, ho...read more »
2025 Classic: The Memory Upload
A guy drinks ten shots and says, "I'm uploading this to my cloud...read more »
2025 Legacy: The Climate Change Cocktail
"I'll have a 'Melting Glacier'." The bartender gives him a glass...read more »
The Panda Order
A lesson in why punctuation matters in nature.A panda walks into ...read more »
2024 Legacy: The Bottle Opener
"The only thing Apple hasn't tried to put a screen on yet."Part ...read more »
64 Bar Jokes: The 1996 “Microbrewery & Martini Mania” Edition
In 1996, bar conversations revolved around two things: whether th...read more »
2025 Classic: The Lab-Grown Lager
"It’s perfect!" "It’s too perfect. I want a beer that has a mist...read more »
The Time Traveler
Coming soon to a bar near you... yesterday.A time traveler walks ...read more »
2024 Classic: The Turkish Shooter
A guy walks into a bar, puts one hand in his pocket, looks at th...read more »
2025 Vintage: The Vertical Farm Garnish
"This mint was grown three feet from your head."Part of the 30 B...read more »
😜 More from category: The Bar Joke Archive: 1995–2025
The Cliffhanger
Ending the night on a very high note.A guy walks into a bar at th...read more »
69 Bar Jokes: The 2003 “Finding Nemo & iTunes Store” Edition
In 2003, the bar was the place to be if you wanted to debate the ...read more »
71 Bar Jokes: The 2002 “Spider-Man & Euro Currency” Edition
In 2002, the bar scene was a mix of superhero hype and the birth ...read more »
The Bear Patience
Why pauses are important in conversation.A bear walks into a bar ...read more »
⏳ Time Capsule: This is how we rolled in the first two decades of the internet
Anyone else reading this in the middle of the night? LOL!
I came here to kick ass and read jokes... and I’m all out of gum.
I’m taking the dog, dumbass! And the joke!
Found: Hilarious_Joke_1999.txt
Dead or alive, you’re laughing with me.
I’m doing my part! Are you? (Laughing).
Don’t ever call me "doll". But you can call me "funny".
Cowabunga, dude! Pass the pizza and the jokes.
The spinning envelope told me to come here.