2016 Archive: The Magnificent Seven
“I’m putting together a team of gunslingers!” “You and your six drinking buddies aren’t magnificent, you’re just a noise complaint.” Part of the 52 Adult Jokes: The… Read More »2016 Archive: The Magnificent Seven
2016 Legacy: The Dash Button
Why was the traveler pressing a button on his wall? Because Amazon released “Dash Buttons” and he wanted to order more toilet paper without moving.… Read More »2016 Legacy: The Dash Button
2015 Legacy: The Barcelona Treble
Why was the “MSN” (Messi, Suarez, Neymar) illegal? Because having that much talent in one attack was basically like playing a video game with the… Read More »2015 Legacy: The Barcelona Treble
2014 Legacy: Best Rap Performance
Why “Thrift Shop”? Because it was the first time “poppin’ tags” was considered a high-art musical achievement. Part of the 39 Grammy Jokes: The 2014… Read More »2014 Legacy: Best Rap Performance
2014 Classic: The Stethoscope
“Your heart sounds like a vibrating phone.” Part of the 61 Doctor Jokes: The 2014 “Ice Bucket Challenge & HealthKit” Edition archive. Historically Verified
2014 Vintage: The Pinterest Board
Why did the lawyer have a “Shredder Inspiration” board? To find the one that could handle 500 pages of “ethics.” Part of the 50 Lawyer… Read More »2014 Vintage: The Pinterest Board
2014 Archive: The Number
I’m “counting” my followers like they’re real friends. Part of the 111 Classic Punny One-Liners: The Ice Bucket & Interstellar Edition (2014) archive. Historically Verified
2012 Classic: The Avengers Premiere
Why was New York full of aliens? Because Marvel finally put all their toys in one box, proving that a billionaire, a frozen soldier, and… Read More »2012 Classic: The Avengers Premiere
2011 Legacy: The Mitt Romney “Corporations are People” Quote
Why was this a hit? Because in 2011, telling a crowd that a “Company” is a “Person” is like telling a kid that a “Vegetable”… Read More »2011 Legacy: The Mitt Romney “Corporations are People” Quote
2010 Vintage: The Expendables Muscles
Why so much leather? For a movie that gathered every action star from the 80s just to prove that their collective age was higher than… Read More »2010 Vintage: The Expendables Muscles