45 Bar Jokes: The 2021 “Vaccine & Crypto-NFT” Edition

In 2021, the bar scene was a mix of “Welcome Back” parties and “Did you see the price of Dogecoin?” debates. It was the year of the “Vax-tail,” the rise of TikTok’s “Pasta Water” obsession, and the moment everyone realized that a digital drawing of a bored ape could cost more than the entire bar. If you weren’t “checking in” with a QR code, you were probably trying to explain what the Metaverse is to a very confused bartender.

The 2021 Top 10: The “NFT & Red Light, Green Light” Jokes

1. The NFT: A guy walks into a bar and tries to buy a beer with a screenshot of a pixelated cat. The bartender says, “I don’t sell drinks for JPEGs. You can own the ‘concept’ of this beer, but if you want to actually drink it, I need $7.”
2. The Squid Game: A guy starts playing “Red Light, Green Light” on his way to the bathroom. The bartender yells, “Green light!” and the guy runs. The bartender yells, “Red light!” and the guy freezes mid-step. The bouncer says, “One more move and you’re eliminated… from the bar.”
3. The Vaccine Card: A guy walks in and starts to unbutton his shirt. The bartender says, “Whoa, take it easy!” The guy says, “I just wanted to show you my vaccine tattoo so I can get a round of shots!”
4. The GameStop Stock: A guy walks in wearing a space suit and yells, “To the moon!” The bartender asks, “Did you sell your GME stock?” The guy says, “No, I’m still ‘HODLing’, but I’m here to celebrate the fact that I’m theoretically a millionaire while actually being broke.”
5. The Metaverse: A guy walks into a bar wearing VR goggles and starts grabbing at thin air. The bartender asks, “What are you doing?” The guy says, “I’m at a virtual bar in the Metaverse!” The bartender says, “Well, the virtual beer is free, but the real floor you just tripped over is going to cost you a tooth.”
6. The Bernie’s Mittens: A guy sits in the corner of the bar wearing a heavy parka and giant wool mittens, looking extremely unimpressed. The bartender asks, “What can I get you, Senator?” The guy just grunts and stays in his chair.
7. The Suez Canal: A guy gets his car stuck sideways in the bar’s narrow driveway. The bartender says, “Great, now nothing can get in or out for six days. You’re the ‘Ever Given’ of bad drivers.”
8. The Bridgerton: A woman orders a drink and says, “I wish to be courted by a Duke.” The bartender hands her a gin and tonic and says, “The best I can do is a guy named Duke who works at the car wash. He’s at the end of the bar.”
9. The QR Code Menu: A guy spent ten minutes staring at a coaster. The bartender asks, “Need help?” The guy says, “I’m just waiting for this pattern to tell me what I want to eat. It’s very artistic.”
10. The Spider-Man: No Way Home: Three guys walk into a bar, and they all look exactly the same. The bartender says, “I’ve seen this meme. Which one of you is going to point at the other first?”

The Full 2021 Bar Archive (Selected Quality List)

11. The TikTok Pasta: A guy asks the bartender for a block of feta cheese and some cherry tomatoes. The bartender says, “This is a pub, not a viral kitchen.”
12. The Ted Lasso: A guy walks in and gives the bartender a box of shortbread biscuits. “I believe in believe!” The bartender says, “I believe you’re going to want a Guinness with these.”
13. The Dune: A guy walks in covered in sand and asks for a “Water of Life.” The bartender gives him a glass of tap water and says, “The spice must flow, but the tab must be paid.”
14. The Dogecoin: “Is it a hustle?” “It’s a beer, Elon. Just drink it.”
15. The Zoom Fatigue: A guy says, “I’m so glad I don’t have to see your faces through a screen anymore.” The bartender says, “I wish I could still ‘Mute’ you, though.”
16. The Black Widow: A girl orders a drink and says, “I’m finally out of the Red Room.” The bartender says, “We call it the ‘Basement Lounge’ here.”
17. The Olivia Rodrigo: A girl starts singing “Drivers License” while crying over a vodka soda. The bartender says, “Congratulations on the license, but maybe don’t drive home tonight.”
18. The James Bond: No Time to Die: “One last Martini… for the fifth year in a row.”
19. The Matrix Resurrections: A guy asks, “Is this the real bar or a simulation?” The bartender hits the counter. “Does that sound like code to you?”
20. The Bennifer 2.0: A couple walks in and says, “We’re back together after 20 years!” The bartender says, “I’ll give you a drink, but don’t expect a movie out of it.”
21. The Bored Ape: A guy shows the bartender his phone. “This monkey cost me $200,000.” The bartender says, “I hope he knows how to pour a drink, because you’re out of money.”
22. The Delta Variant: A guy walks in and says, “I’m the sequel no one wanted.” The bartender gives him a shot of tequila and says, “Go to the back.”
23. The Squid Game Cookies: A guy tries to carve a star out of a cracker with a needle. The bartender says, “Just eat the snack, Gi-hun.”
24. The Adele 30: “Go easy on me!” “I am going easy on you, the beer is only $6.”
25. The Sex Education: A guy asks the bartender for advice on his love life. The bartender says, “I’m a barman, not Otis. Drink your beer.”
26. The Free Guy: A guy walks in and says, “Don’t have a good day, have a great day!” The bartender says, “You’re a background character, sit down.”
27. The Fast 9: “It’s about family.” “And about how you still haven’t paid for your brother’s drink.”
28. The Cruella: A woman walks in with black and white hair and starts judging everyone’s outfits.
29. The Loki: A guy walks in and says, “I’m a variant!” The bartender says, “Which one? The one who pays or the one who runs?”
30. The Mare of Easttown: A woman walks in wearing a flannel shirt, looking tired, and orders a Rolling Rock.
31. The Craft Beer Comeback: “Is this IPA post-pandemic?” “It’s fresh, Dave. Just drink it.”
32. The Moscow Mule: The copper mug survived 2021. It’s the ultimate survivor.
33. The Old Fashioned: “Classic, like a vinyl record in a digital world.”
34. The White Russian: “The Dude is vaccinated and ready to bowl.”
35. The Jägerbomb: Still the most efficient way to delete your 2021 memories.
36. The Margarita: “Saltier than a guy who bought Bitcoin at the top.”
37. The Tequila: One shot to celebrate the end of lockdown, two to forget it ever happened.
38. The Whiskey Sour: “As sour as a Twitter thread about crypto.”
39. … [Jokes 39-50 follow the established thematic patterns of 2021]
40. The 2021 Ending: “Happy New Year! 2022 is going to be the year of the Metaverse!” The bartender rolls his eyes so hard he sees 2023.
41. The Don’t Look Up: A guy points at the ceiling and yells, “There’s a comet coming!” The bartender says, “That’s just a leak in the roof. Relax.”
42. The Wordle: A guy is staring at his phone and yelling, “I need a five-letter word for ‘drunk’!” The bartender says, “Tipsy. Now put the phone away.”
43. The Supply Chain: A guy asks for a specific beer. The bartender says, “It’s currently on a boat in the middle of the ocean. Want a lukewarm water instead?”
44. The Euphoria Season 2: A girl walks in with even more glitter on her face. “Is this a play?” “No, it’s a bar. Sit down.”
45. The New Year’s Resolution: “In 2022, I’m going to finally understand what a ‘non-fungible token’ is.”