A guy walks in with a creature from a swamp. The bartender says, “No pets.” The guy says, “It’s okay, we’re in a deep, romantic relationship.” The bartender sighs, “Fine, but if he leaks on the floor, you’re mopping it.”
Part of the 51 Bar Jokes: The 2017 “Fidget Spinner & Bitcoin Boom” Edition archive. Historically Verified
🔥 Top 10: The Bar Joke Archive: 1995–2025
53 Bar Jokes: The 2013 “Selfie & Harlem Shake” Edition
In 2013, if you didn't take a picture with your drink, it was lik...read more »
The Talking Dog
Man’s best friend shows off a very profitable skill.A guy walks i...read more »
79 Bar Jokes: The 1999 “Party Like It’s 1999 & Y2K Panic” Edition
In 1999, every night at the bar felt like the last night on Earth...read more »
The Panda Order
A lesson in why punctuation matters in nature.A panda walks into ...read more »
2025 Legacy: The Bio-Metric Pour
The tap only works if your fingerprint proves you've had at leas...read more »
2025 Classic: The AI Hallucination
A guy insists there's a dragon in the bar. The bartender says, "...read more »
The Time Traveler
Coming soon to a bar near you... yesterday.A time traveler walks ...read more »
55 Bar Jokes: The 2023 “Barbenheimer & ChatGPT” Edition
In 2023, the bar was the ultimate cultural crossroads. You had gr...read more »
The Neutron Special
Science meets the social scene in this high-IQ hit.A neutron walk...read more »
The Mushroom Character
Why fungi are always the life of the party.A mushroom walks into ...read more »
😜 More from category: The Bar Joke Archive: 1995–2025
2025 Legacy: The Climate Change Cocktail
"I'll have a 'Melting Glacier'." The bartender gives him a glass...read more »
2025 Classic: The Memory Upload
A guy drinks ten shots and says, "I'm uploading this to my cloud...read more »
37 Celebrity Jokes: The 2006 “Very Nice!” Edition
In 2006, we were all trying to sound like a Kazakh journalist, le...read more »
2025 Classic: The 2025 Fashion
A guy walks in wearing a suit made of flexible OLED screens. The...read more »
⏳ Time Capsule: This is how we rolled in the first two decades of the internet
There is no cow level, but there is this joke!
Dead or alive, you’re laughing with me.
We’re going streaking! Through the jokes!
Greetings, Traveler! Care for a joke?
Hacking into the comedy mainframe.