What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
Part of the 58 Classic Dad Jokes: The 1999 Millennium Edition archive. Historically Verified
🔥 Top 10: The Dad Joke Archive (1995-2025)
Why don't mountains get cold in winter?
They wear snow caps.read more »
Q: Where do penguins keep their...
Q: Where do penguins keep their money?
A: In a snowbank!read more »
Why did the math book look sad?
It had too many problems.read more »
Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don’t work.read more »
Why can't your nose be 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot.read more »
Kid: I had a thought. Dad:...
Kid: I had a thought.
Dad: I thought I smelled something burning...read more »
57 Original Dad Jokes: The 2015 "The Dress" Edition
In 2015, the world couldn't agree on anything—especially not the ...read more »
Why don't eggs go to parties?
They don’t want to get beaten.read more »
Why don't eggs tell jokes?
They’d crack each other up.read more »
Kid: Ow, I hurt my foot!...
Kid: Ow, I hurt my foot!
Dad: Well, what’d you do that for?read more »
😜 More from category: The Dad Joke Archive (1995-2025)
55 Original Dad Jokes: The 2007 "Touchscreen" Edition
The year 2007 changed everything. While the world was busy trying...read more »
Kid: What’s that? Dad: It’s a...
Kid: What’s that?
Dad: It’s a henweigh.
Kid: What’s a henweigh?...read more »
Why are ghosts bad at lying?
Because you can see right through them.read more »
Dad: Is anyone here capable of...
Dad: Is anyone here capable of putting their shoes on in a timely...read more »
⏳ Time Capsule: This is how we rolled in the first two decades of the internet
The coolest joke in the zip code.
Stuck in the middle with you... laughing.
The stars are aligned for this joke.
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Hacking into the comedy mainframe.