Housework is a team sport, but someone is always on the bench.
My wife asked me to help with the spring cleaning. I told her I’m “spiritually opposed” to dust. She told me she’s “spiritually opposed” to making me dinner.
ADDED BY: Trogdor_Burn
✓ HUMAN VERIFIED CONTENT
✓ HUMAN VERIFIED CONTENT
🔥 Top 10: The Marriage Humor Archive: 1995–2025 Archive
1. 2018 Archive: The Instant Family
I told her we’re an instant family. She said, "There was nothing 'instant' about the twelve hour... read more »
I told her we’re an instant family. She said, "There was nothing 'instant' about the twelve hour... read more »
2. 2022 Archive: The Status
2022. Still "Solving" the marriage Wordle. Today’s word: "DONE."Part of the 62 Marriage Jokes: T... read more »
2022. Still "Solving" the marriage Wordle. Today’s word: "DONE."Part of the 62 Marriage Jokes: T... read more »
3. The Argument Winner
A tactical guide to winning every domestic debate.I always have the last word in an argument with... read more »
A tactical guide to winning every domestic debate.I always have the last word in an argument with... read more »
4. 2006 Classic: The Marie Antoinette
She wants a "lavish" lifestyle. I told her I’m a "lavish" husband on a "leftovers" budget.Part o... read more »
She wants a "lavish" lifestyle. I told her I’m a "lavish" husband on a "leftovers" budget.Part o... read more »
5. 2016 Legacy: The Chainsmokers
"Closer." I told her I’m never getting older. She pointed at my gray hairs and said, "The mirror... read more »
"Closer." I told her I’m never getting older. She pointed at my gray hairs and said, "The mirror... read more »
6. 2012 Vintage: The Tinder Curiosity
We looked at the app together. My wife said, "If I were on here, I’d swipe left on your profile ... read more »
We looked at the app together. My wife said, "If I were on here, I’d swipe left on your profile ... read more »
7. 1997 Legacy: The Exercise
She bought an Ab Roller. It’s currently being used as a very expensive doorstop.Part of the 65 M... read more »
She bought an Ab Roller. It’s currently being used as a very expensive doorstop.Part of the 65 M... read more »
8. 2014 Legacy: The 2014 Wrap-up
We looked at our "Top Nine" on Instagram. It’s six pictures of the cat, two of her coffee, and o... read more »
We looked at our "Top Nine" on Instagram. It’s six pictures of the cat, two of her coffee, and o... read more »
9. 2003 Vintage: The Monster-in-Law
She saw the trailer. She told me my mother is exactly like Jane Fonda. I told her that’s a compl... read more »
She saw the trailer. She told me my mother is exactly like Jane Fonda. I told her that’s a compl... read more »
10. 1999 Archive: The Millionaire
We watched Who Wants to Be a Millionaire. I used my "Phone a Friend" to call my wife and ask whe... read more »
We watched Who Wants to Be a Millionaire. I used my "Phone a Friend" to call my wife and ask whe... read more »
Warning: More Bad Jokes Ahead
Our Comment Archive
[1995-11-30 ARCHIVE_LOG]ModemWarrior: I had to disconnect my phone line just to read this! Worth it!
[1997-12-08 ARCHIVE_LOG]ICQ_Master99: Uh-oh! Adding this to my status message right now.
[1999-05-30 ARCHIVE_LOG]The_Mask_Smokin: P-A-R-T-Y? Because I’m laughing!
[1997-08-25 ARCHIVE_LOG]Lion_King_Pumbaa: They call me MISTER PIG! And I like this joke!
[2001-08-09 ARCHIVE_LOG]Trainspotting_Rent: Choose life. Choose a joke.
[1996-09-29 ARCHIVE_LOG]Jackie_Brown_Fan: Smooth joke, very smooth.
[2001-07-30 ARCHIVE_LOG]Chocolate_Rain: I move away from the mic to breathe... and laugh.
[2013-02-04 ARCHIVE_LOG]Trololo_Man_70: Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha! Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho!
[2012-07-06 ARCHIVE_LOG]Blogger_Default: Posted on my blog: "Why this site is awesome".
TOTAL VERIFIED VIEWS: 1,422,246
[ DATA SYNCED WITH 1995-2025 LEGACY DATABASE ]
[ DATA SYNCED WITH 1995-2025 LEGACY DATABASE ]
haha, the logic is flawless in its own way.
literally the story of my life.
i thought it was going to be a long story but short ones are the best.