Why was the wedding special longer than the marriage? Because in 2011, Kris Humphries learned that being a Kardashian husband is a seasonal gig, not… Read More »2011 Classic: Kim Kardashian’s 72-Day Marriage
“I lost my ‘Mayor’ status at the gym!” “Does that mean you’ll actually work out now instead of just standing by the water cooler checking your phone?”… Read More »2010 Archive: The Foursquare Mayor Part 2
“Count backwards from ten.” “Ten… nine… eight… Steve Jobs…” Part of the 63 Doctor Jokes: The 2010 “iPad Launch & Obamacare Debate” Edition archive. Historically… Read More »2010 Classic: The Anesthesia
Looking at a brand-new, shiny first-generation iPad on the kitchen counter and asking Grandma if she bought a fancy new glass plate for slicing her… Read More »2010 Legacy: The iPad Cutting Board Incident
It’s a tiny computer. I told her it’s cute. She said, “Just like your effort to help with the laundry.” Part of the 63 Marriage… Read More »2009 Classic: The Netbook
Why did the manager call us “Squirrel!”? Because he has the attention span of a Pixar dog during the weekly status update. Part of the… Read More »2009 Legacy: The Up Movie Quote
I’m “folding” my laundry while I vlog. Part of the 199 Classic Punny One-Liners: The Avatar & Bitcoin Dawn (2009) archive. Historically Verified
What do you call a snake that’s a designer? A “boa” constructor. Part of the 52 Original Dad Jokes: The 2008 “Superpower” Edition archive. Historically… Read More »2008 Archive: The Scared Snake
Keeping a secret compartment in a leather wallet dedicated entirely to long-distance minutes, treating them with more respect than actual government currency. Part of the… Read More »2007 Vintage: The Prepaid Phone Card Vault
I’m “pride-ful” of my digital presence. Part of the 162 Classic Punny One-Liners: The “You” & Twttr Edition (2006) archive. Historically Verified
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