We’ve reached a peak in civilization where grown adults are wrestling in toy store aisles for a red Muppet that giggles when you poke it.… Read More »1996 Vintage: The Tickle Me Elmo Riot

 Why do all our news anchors look like they’re wearing their father’s suit to a middle school dance? Part of the 60 Observational One-Liners: The… Read More »1996 Classic: The Baggy Suit Trend

 The official word of 1996 is “Whatever,” usually accompanied by a dramatic eye roll and a flannel shirt. Part of the 60 Observational One-Liners: The… Read More »1996 Legacy: The “Whatever” Attitude

 My boss gave me a memo that is currently curling into a tube and turning black because it’s too close to the coffee machine. Part… Read More »1996 Legacy: The Thermal Fax Paper

 After seeing Will Smith punch an alien, I spent the rest of the summer looking at clouds with a suspicious amount of side-eye. Part of… Read More »1996 Archive: The Independence Day Fear

 I remember when coffee was 50 cents and came in one size: “Coffee.” Now it’s a “Grande” and costs as much as a car payment.… Read More »1996 Archive: The Starbucks Expansion

 My personal homepage has a “Hit Counter” that says 42, and I’m pretty sure 41 of those were me refreshing the page. Part of the… Read More »1996 Archive: The Web Counter

 I have enough pockets to carry a spare tire, but I’m only using them for my Chapstick and a pager. Part of the 60 Observational… Read More »1996 Vintage: The Cargo Short Cargo

 Why do we own a machine capable of recording history, but the only thing it ever does is blink “12:00” like a failed digital clock?… Read More »1995 Archive: The VCR Paradox

 I’m a grown adult, yet I’m paralyzed by the fear that my digital plastic egg will die if I don’t “feed” it during my lunch… Read More »1995 Legacy: The Tamagotchi Stress