2008 Archive: The Fabric
I’m “weaving” a new story. Part of the 188 Classic Punny One-Liners: The Stark & Dark Knight Edition (2008) archive. Historically Verified
2007 Legacy: The “Coalition” Withdrawal
Why did the Danes leave? To get home in time to remind the world that they were “There for the important part” (the first 15… Read More »2007 Legacy: The “Coalition” Withdrawal
2007 Classic: The Mattel “Recall”
Why did it affect sports? Because in 2007, everything from toys to jerseys seemed to have lead paint, proving that even our merch was dangerous.… Read More »2007 Classic: The Mattel “Recall”
2006 Classic: The Sun
I’m “shining” on the LCD screen. Part of the 162 Classic Punny One-Liners: The “You” & Twttr Edition (2006) archive. Historically Verified
2006 Vintage: The Speeding Ticket
Why did the lawyer argue that the radar gun was “biased”? He claimed it had a “pre-existing prejudice against fast-moving luxury vehicles.” Part of the… Read More »2006 Vintage: The Speeding Ticket
2006 Vintage: The “See No Evil” Vibe
Why Kane? For proving that WWE wrestlers should stay in the ring and out of the “creepy hotel” genre. Part of the 34 Razzie Awards… Read More »2006 Vintage: The “See No Evil” Vibe
2006 Legacy: Best Male Country Vocal
Why “You’ll Think of Me” by Keith Urban? Because he made “heartbreak with a drum machine” sound like the future of Nashville. Part of the… Read More »2006 Legacy: Best Male Country Vocal
2005 Classic: The Bluetooth
She got a Bluetooth headset. Now she looks like she’s arguing with the air, which honestly isn’t that much different from usual. Part of the… Read More »2005 Classic: The Bluetooth
2005 Archive: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
Why was the bathtub steaming? Because the kids were convinced that if they put their “Triwizard” toys underwater, they’d hear a mermaid singing about the… Read More »2005 Archive: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
2005 Vintage: The Monitor Polish Incident
Spraying a thick layer of lemon-scented furniture wax directly onto the plastic frame of a brand-new desktop computer screen to make it match the oak… Read More »2005 Vintage: The Monitor Polish Incident