2008 Legacy: The Dentist’s Investment
My dentist said he’s stopped investing in stocks and started investing in gold crowns. “It’s the only currency that’s still ‘in the mouth’,” he joked.… Read More »2008 Legacy: The Dentist’s Investment
2007 Classic: The Ellen DeGeneres Vacuum
Why did Ellen start cleaning the carpet? To show that even at the Oscars, someone has to pick up the crumbs of the dreams that… Read More »2007 Classic: The Ellen DeGeneres Vacuum
2006 Classic: Paul McCartney’s Presence
Why was he nominated? Because he’s a Beatle, and the Grammys are legally required to keep him in the front row for as long as… Read More »2006 Classic: Paul McCartney’s Presence
2006 Legacy: The Star
I’m “twinkling” in the digital sky. Part of the 162 Classic Punny One-Liners: The “You” & Twttr Edition (2006) archive. Historically Verified
2006 Classic: Pan’s Labyrinth
Why were the kids afraid of the dinner table? Because they thought the pale man with eyes in his hands was going to jump out… Read More »2006 Classic: Pan’s Labyrinth
2006 Classic: The Wariner vs. Merritt
Why was the 400m so fast? Because Jeremy Wariner in his sunglasses was still the king of the one-lap sprint, at least for one more… Read More »2006 Classic: The Wariner vs. Merritt
2006 Vintage: The Beaded Glasses Chain Drop
Letting a pair of half-moon reading glasses slam violently against a heavy plastic beaded necklace every single time a family member enters the front door.… Read More »2006 Vintage: The Beaded Glasses Chain Drop
2005 Legacy: The End
I’m “finishing” this year with a pun-ch! Part of the 150 Classic Punny One-Liners: The YouTube & Dunder Mifflin Edition (2005) archive. Historically Verified
2005 Classic: The Transporter 2 Logic
Why the bomb? For a scene where Jason Statham flips a car in mid-air to remove a bomb using a crane hook, officially ending the… Read More »2005 Classic: The Transporter 2 Logic
2005 Archive: The Bookmark
Why did the blonde put a post-it note on her monitor? She wanted to “bookmark” a site. Part of the 41 Classic Blonde Jokes: The… Read More »2005 Archive: The Bookmark