I’m on a new seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.
Part of the 61 Classic Dad Jokes: The 1995 Retro Edition archive. Historically Verified
🔥 Top 10: The Dad Joke Archive (1995-2025)
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In 2022, we felt the need for speed—and for a good five-letter wo...read more »
Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?
It was two tired.read more »
Q: Why don’t astronomers like Orion’s...
Q: Why don’t astronomers like Orion’s Belt?
A: It’s a big waist ...read more »
Kid: Dad, how do I look?...
Kid: Dad, how do I look?
Dad: With your eyes.read more »
Dad: What’s this vegetable called? Kid:...
Dad: What’s this vegetable called?
Kid: An artichoke.
Dad: Well...read more »
Why don't skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts.read more »
Why don't oysters share their pearls?
Because they’re shellfish.read more »
Kid: Did you get a haircut?...
Kid: Did you get a haircut?
Dad: No, I got them all cut!read more »
Why did the power went out at the school?
Because the students were too bright.read more »
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Kid: I’m cold. Dad: Then go...
Kid: I’m cold.
Dad: Then go sit in the corner—it’s 90 degrees!read more »
Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?
They wear snow caps.read more »
⏳ Time Capsule: This is how we rolled in the first two decades of the internet
One joke to rule them all!
They call me MISTER PIG! And I like this joke!
I don’t tip, but I do laugh!
I bet I could throw this joke over them mountains.
Bark! (He says it’s funny).
Spinning my leek and laughing at this!