A guy is spinning a piece of plastic on his thumb while ordering. The bartender says, “I’ll serve you when that thing stops, or when your attention span returns—whichever comes first.”
Part of the 51 Bar Jokes: The 2017 “Fidget Spinner & Bitcoin Boom” Edition archive. Historically Verified
🔥 Top 10: The Bar Joke Archive: 1995–2025
79 Bar Jokes: The 1999 “Party Like It’s 1999 & Y2K Panic” Edition
In 1999, every night at the bar felt like the last night on Earth...read more »
2025 Classic: The Self-Driving Tab
A guy gets kicked out for being too drunk. He says, "It’s okay! ...read more »
2024 Classic: The Moscow Mule
The copper mug remains the most stable element in the universe.P...read more »
2024 Legacy: The Bar Snack
"Are these peanuts AI-optimized for crunchiness?"Part of the 58 ...read more »
62 Bar Jokes: The 2008 “Financial Crisis & Iron Man” Edition
In 2008, bar talk shifted from "look at my cool new app" to "look...read more »
The Termite Arrival
Construction humor for the local watering hole.A termite walks in...read more »
The Dyslexic Entry
A linguistic twist on a familiar scene.A dyslexic man walks into ...read more »
2024 Legacy: The Ice Cube
"I'm a hand-carved sphere. I'm very demure."Part of the 58 Bar J...read more »
2025 Vintage: The Smart Stool
The stool moves to the left because it detected a "more interest...read more »
2025 Classic: The Lab-Grown Lager
"It’s perfect!" "It’s too perfect. I want a beer that has a mist...read more »
😜 More from category: The Bar Joke Archive: 1995–2025
56 Bar Jokes: The 1995 “Neon Signs & Jukebox” Edition
In 1995, bar humor was built on the classic "A guy walks into a b...read more »
2025 Vintage: The Vertical Farm Garnish
"This mint was grown three feet from your head."Part of the 30 B...read more »
2024 Legacy: The Draft Beer
"100% human-poured and carbonated."Part of the 58 Bar Jokes: The...read more »
The Bear Patience
Why pauses are important in conversation.A bear walks into a bar ...read more »
⏳ Time Capsule: This is how we rolled in the first two decades of the internet
C:>RUN JOKE.EXE... Results: HIGHLY FUNNY.
Don’t flash that neuralyzer, I want to remember this!
Shuffling... and this joke came up first!
Silently laughing in the snow.
Very nice! Great success!
I’m not saying it’s aliens... but it’s aliens.
Not sure if joke is funny... or just very funny.