53 Yo Mama Jokes: The 2011 “Game of Thrones & Skyrim” Edition

In 2011, we were all busy shouting “Fus Ro Dah!” and trying to survive a wedding in Westeros. It was the year of the Snapchat launch, the death of Steve Jobs, and the realization that Yo Mama is the only person who can walk into a Dragon’s lair and make the Dragon offer her its gold just so she’ll leave.

The 2011 Top 10: The “Westeros & Dovahkiin” Burns

1. The Game of Thrones Special: Yo mama is so fat, when she sat on the Iron Throne, it turned into a flat sheet of metal, and the locals called it “The Age of the Iron Pancake.”
2. The Skyrim Vibe: Yo mama is so ugly, when she tried to use the “Fus Ro Dah” shout, the wind refused to blow because it didn’t want to carry her breath.
3. The Snapchat Launch: Yo mama is so old, she tried to use Snapchat by drawing a picture on a piece of paper, showing it to me for 10 seconds, and then eating the paper.
4. The Minecraft Full Release: Yo mama is so big, when she entered a Minecraft world, the game crashed because the map “Infinite” wasn’t actually big enough to render her left foot.
5. The Harry Potter Finale (Part 2): Yo mama is so scary, when Lord Voldemort saw her, he realized that being “He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named” was a privilege compared to being “Her-Who-Looks-Like-Your-Mama.”
6. The Siri Debut: Yo mama is so stupid, she spent three hours arguing with Siri because the phone told her: “I’m sorry, I can’t find a brain in your current location.”
7. The Rebecca Black “Friday”: Yo mama is so fat, when she heard “it’s Friday, Friday,” she thought it was a countdown to a 72-hour unlimited buffet.
8. The Royal Wedding: Yo mama is so ugly, when Prince William saw her at the wedding, he asked Kate Middleton if they could exchange her for the dragon from Shrek.
9. The Adele “Rolling in the Deep”: Yo mama is so big, when Adele sang “We could have had it all,” she was looking at your mama’s plate at the Golden Corral.
10. The Plank Challenge: Yo mama is so fat, when she tried to do the “planking” challenge, she didn’t look like a board—she looked like a tectonic plate shift.

The Full 2011 Yo Mama Archive (Selected Highlights)

11. Yo mama is so poor, she goes to the local library just to use the “Free Samples” in the magazines as perfume.
12. Yo mama is so fat, when she wears a “Don’t Walk” sign, the entire city stops moving for a week.
13. Yo mama is so stupid, she tried to “recharge” her credit card by putting it in the microwave.
14. Yo mama is so ugly, her birth certificate is actually a “Terms of Service” agreement that the hospital regretted.
15. Yo mama is so old, her Social Security number is “1” (She says she’ll never forgive Eve for the apple incident).
16. Yo mama is so fat, her belt size is “To Be Continued on 4G LTE.”
17. Yo mama is so stupid, she thought “The Cloud” was where they stored the marshmallows for the internet.
18. Yo mama is so poor, her “flat-screen TV” is a window with a black frame around it.
19. Yo mama is so ugly, she turned a “Beauty” vlog into a Netflix Horror Original.
20. Yo mama is so fat, when she falls, she doesn’t make a sound—she makes a Richter scale reading.
21. Yo mama is so stupid, she took a spoon to a “data stream” because she heard it was “liquid.”
22. Yo mama is so old, she remember when the “Dead Sea” was still “The Sea that Needs a Nap.”
23. Yo mama is so fat, when she wears yellow, everyone yells “Taxi!”—even the ISS astronauts.
24. Yo mama is so poor, she waves a wet towel around and calls it “a spa experience.”
25. Yo mama is so ugly, she made Medusa look like a Victoria’s Secret model.
26. Yo mama is so stupid, she got hit by a parked car… while she was the one walking it.
27. Yo mama is so fat, when she goes to a restaurant, she doesn’t look at the menu—she looks at the blueprints.
28. Yo mama is so old, she knew Burger King when he was just a Prince’s footman.
29. Yo mama is so poor, she goes to the bank just to stand in the air conditioning.
30. Yo mama is so ugly, even a blind man would say “No thanks, I’m good.”
31. Yo mama is so fat, her shadow has its own zip code and its own time zone.
32. Yo mama is so stupid, she put a “Do Not Disturb” sign on her forehead and wondered why no one would talk to her.
33. Yo mama is so old, she sat next to Moses in kindergarten… and she was the one who taught him how to color.
34. Yo mama is so fat, she’s the reason the Earth has a slight bulge at the equator.
35. Yo mama is so poor, she uses a Cheeto as a highlighter.
36. Yo mama is so ugly, when she walks into a bank, they turn off the cameras to save the viewers.
37. Yo mama is so stupid, she stared at an orange juice carton for three hours because it said “Concentrate.”
38. Yo mama is so fat, she needs a GPS to find her own feet.
39. Yo mama is so old, she has a signed copy of the Ten Commandments.
40. Yo mama is so poor, she can’t even afford to pay attention.
41. Yo mama is so ugly, her face is the reason we have the “Skip Ad” button.
42. Yo mama is so stupid, she tried to light a match with a flashlight.
43. Yo mama is so fat, her necktie is a beach towel.
44. Yo mama is so old, her birth certificate says “Expired.”
45. Yo mama is so poor, she goes to McDonald’s to put a McDouble on layaway.
46. Yo mama is so ugly, she turned Medusa into a pile of salt.
47. Yo mama is so stupid, she put sugar on the bed because she wanted “sweet dreams.”
48. Yo mama is so fat, she has to use a boomerang to put on her belt.
49. Yo mama is so old, her birthday candles are the primary cause of global warming.
50. Yo mama is so poor, she waves a popsicle stick around and calls it “Air Conditioning.”
51. Yo mama is so stupid, she thought the “G-20 Summit” was a new brand of mountain bike.
52. Yo mama is so fat, when she jumps into the air, she gets stuck.
53. Yo mama is so stupid, she thought “WiFi” stood for “Why I Fail Internally.”