37 Fourth of July Jokes: The 2011 “Party Rock & Potter’s End” Edition

In 2011, Independence Day was all about “Every day I’m shufflin’.” We were wearing neon shutter shades (again), obsessed with “Planking” on top of outdoor furniture, and trying to figure out how to use Siri on our new iPhone 4S to find the nearest fireworks display. It was a year of epic finales, royal weddings, and the realization that a group of bridesmaids could be just as funny as the guys.

The 2011 Independence Top 10: “Shuffle-bots & Sorcery”

1. The Harry Potter Grand Finale: Why was the 2011 BBQ so magical? Because the last movie was coming out in July, and everyone was treating their sparklers like the Elder Wand, shouting “Expelliarmus!” at the mosquitoes.
2. The “Party Rock Anthem” Invasion: Why was the 2011 parade so energetic? Because LMFAO made it mandatory to “shuffle” every time you moved from the cooler to the grill, even if you were wearing flip-flops.
3. The Royal Wedding Fever: Why were the BBQ guests so posh? Because William and Kate got married in April, and half the moms at the party were still wearing fascinators and talking in fake British accents while eating hot dogs.
4. The “Planking” Trend: Why were there people lying face-down on the picnic tables? Because 2011 was the year of “Planking,” and apparently, looking like a piece of lumber was the height of comedy.
5. The Bridesmaids Effect: Why were the ladies at the BBQ so hilarious? Because Maya Rudolph and Kristen Wiig proved that a “wardrobe malfunction” in a bridal shop is the funniest thing that can happen to a human being.
6. The “Rolling in the Deep” Vocals: Why did everyone get so emotional during the fireworks? Because Adele was everywhere, making us all feel like we were having a soulful breakup with our own hamburgers.
7. The Game of Thrones Premiere: Why was the Dad acting so intense? Because the first season just ended, and he spent the whole BBQ staring at the horizon whispering, “Winter is coming,” while sweating in the July heat.
8. The Minecraft Full Release: Why were the kids building weird towers with the charcoal? Because Minecraft was taking over their lives, and they were trying to “craft” a creeper-proof fort out of napkins and soda cans.
9. The “Friday” (Rebecca Black) PTSD: Why did everyone panic when July 4th fell on a Friday? Because we spent the whole spring trying to get that song out of our heads, and “Which seat can I take?” was a very real question at a crowded picnic.
10. The Captain America: The First Avenger: Why was the 4th so patriotic? Because Chris Evans arrived to show us that a shield and a good heart are the ultimate 1940s accessories for a 2011 world.

The Full 2011 Fourth of July Archive

11. The “Super Bass” Nicki Minaj: Why was the 2011 BBQ so colorful? Because Nicki Minaj made pink hair and “boom-badoom-boom” beats the official aesthetic of the summer.
12. The Thor Hammer Issues: Why was the Dad struggling with the grill lid? Because Chris Hemsworth made him think that if he wasn’t “worthy,” the lid simply wouldn’t lift.
13. The “Moves Like Jagger” Loop: Why was everyone whistling? Because Maroon 5 and Christina Aguilera made sure that “whistle hook” was stuck in our brains until at least 2012.
14. The The Help Pie Caution: Why did nobody want to try the “special” chocolate pie? Because the movie taught us that when a cook is angry, you stay far away from the dessert table.
15. The “Give Me Everything” Pitbull: Why was the 4th of July so “Mr. Worldwide”? Because Pitbull was on every track, reminding us to “grab somebody sexy” (or at least someone holding a plate of ribs).
16. The Fast Five Vault Chase: Why was the car parade so intense? Because Vin Diesel and The Rock turned the franchise into a heist movie, making every driver feel like they were dragging a giant safe down Main Street.
17. The “E.T.” Katy Perry & Kanye: Why were we looking for aliens again? Because Katy Perry’s music video made “intergalactic chic” a thing, and we were all “alienated” by the humidity.
18. The X-Men: First Class: Why was the BBQ “retro”? Because the movie took us back to the 60s, and suddenly Grandpa’s old BBQ stories felt like a Marvel prequel.
19. The “Grenade” Bruno Mars: Why was the 4th so sacrificial? Because Bruno Mars was willing to “catch a grenade” for us, which made our fear of a small sparkler seem a bit dramatic.
20. The The Hangover Part II: Why was there a monkey at the party? Because the sequel moved to Bangkok, and we all learned that “Bangkok has them now” (including the missing car keys).
21. The “Last Friday Night (T.G.I.F.)”: Why was there a stranger in the bed? Because Katy Perry’s song made us all think that a 4th of July party wasn’t a success unless there was a parrot in the bathroom.
22. The Rise of the Planet of the Apes: Why were we being so nice to the local squirrels? Because Andy Serkis made us realize that the animals are just one “smart drug” away from taking over the patio.
23. The “On the Floor” Jennifer Lopez: Why was J-Lo back? Because Pitbull invited her to the dance floor, and they stayed there for the entire summer of 2011.
24. The Cars 2 Spy Theme: Why was the tricycle equipped with gadgets? Because Lightning McQueen became a secret agent, and every kid thought their toy car had hidden missiles.
25. The “S&M” Rihanna: Why was the 4th so “controversial”? Because the radio had to bleep out half the song while we were trying to eat corn with our parents.
26. The Horrible Bosses Plan: Why were the neighbors whispering? Because Jason Bateman and Charlie Day made “conspiring against your boss” a great conversation topic for a long weekend.
27. The “Pumped Up Kicks” Mystery: Why was the 2011 BBQ so “indie”? Because Foster the People created the catchiest song ever about… well, we tried not to think about the lyrics while flipping burgers.
28. The Transformers: Dark of the Moon: Why were the fireworks so metallic? Because Michael Bay moved the fight to the moon, making the “Grand Finale” look like a robot junkyard falling from the sky.
29. The “Someone Like You” Adele: Why was the 4th so tearful? Because Adele’s piano ballad made everyone miss an ex they didn’t even have.
30. The Green Lantern Ring: Why was the host wearing a plastic green ring? Because Ryan Reynolds convinced him that “In brightest day, in blackest night,” no burger shall escape his sight.
31. The “Good Feeling” Flo Rida: Why was the 2011 vibe so high? Because Etta James’s voice remixed with a dance beat was the ultimate “feel good” fuel for a parade.
32. The Puss in Boots Teasers: Why was the cat acting so suave? Because the spin-off was coming, and we all realized that Antonio Banderas’s voice makes everything—even a hairball—sound legendary.
33. The “Sexy and I Know It” Wiggle: Why was the Uncle in the speedo? Because LMFAO made “wiggling” a lifestyle choice, much to the horror of everyone near the pool.
34. The Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol: Why was the Dad climbing the side of the house? Because Tom Cruise climbed the Burj Khalifa, and the Dad thought the second-story gutter was “basically the same thing.”
35. The “Born This Way” Lady Gaga: Why was the 4th so “expressive”? Because Gaga told us we were superstars, and we took that as permission to wear a cape to the firework show.
36. The The Muppets Comeback: Why was the 4th so nostalgic? Because Jason Segel brought Kermit and Piggy back, reminding us that “Life’s a Happy Song” when there’s a BBQ at the end of it.
37. The 2011 Final Vibe: Why was it a “Shuffle” 4th? Because we were “Party Rocking,” checking our “Planking” photos on Instagram, and realizing that even if Voldemort was gone, the party was just getting started.