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Home » The Military Joke Archive: 1995–2025 » 2017 Archive: The “Tactical” Beard Ban (Part 2)

2017 Archive: The “Tactical” Beard Ban (Part 2)

Why did the beards start to vanish? Because the “Surge” was over and the Sergeants Major finally regained their “Shaving-Cream Power.”

Part of the 34 Military Jokes: The 2017 “Mother of All Bombs & Fire and Fury” Edition archive. Historically Verified

🔥 Top 10: The Military Joke Archive: 1995–2025

41 Military Jokes: The 2007 “The Surge & Reaper’s Harvest” Edition
In 2007, the "Peace Dividend" wasn't just dead; it was buried und...read more »
2025 Vintage: The "Laser" Point-Defense
Why the "Pew-Pew" sounds? Because the Air Force realized that if ...read more »
2024 Vintage: The "Targeting" Pod (Sniper Gen 10)
Why the 12K upgrade? To see if the enemy soldier is using a "Pro"...read more »
2025 Classic: The Autonomous Swarm Debut
Why was 2025 the year of the "Mosquito"? Because the military rea...read more »
2024 Vintage: The "Hearts and Minds" 2024
Why the "Signal-Aid"? Because providing a "Secure VPN" is the new...read more »
2024 Classic: The "Night Vision" GPNVG-24
Why the sixth sense? To ensure the "Operator" can see the future,...read more »
2024 Vintage: The "Patriot" vs. "Everything"
Why is the Patriot the MVP? Because it’s the only 40-year-old in ...read more »
34 Military Jokes: The 2017 “Mother of All Bombs & Fire and Fury” Edition
In 2017, the military realized that "Strategic Patience" was offi...read more »
37 Military Jokes: The 2013 “Snowden Leaks & Stealth Drones” Edition
In 2013, the military realized that the "Eye in the Sky" was also...read more »
2023 Legacy: The "Night Vision" White Phosphor
Why the demand? Because the "New White" makes the war look like a...read more »

😜 More from category: The Military Joke Archive: 1995–2025

2025 Classic: The "Bio-Metric" ID 2025
Why the DNA scan? To make sure you’re actually a "Human" and not ...read more »
2024 Archive: The "Bio-Metric" Deepfakes
Why did the guard fail the scan? Because the "Infiltrator" used a...read more »
38 Military Jokes: The 1999 “Targeting & Timeline” Edition
In 1999, the military was living on the edge of a digital apocaly...read more »
2025 Archive: The "Information Operations" AI-Deepfakes
Why the confusion? Because in 2025, you’re not sure if the Genera...read more »

⏳ Time Capsule: This is how we rolled in the first two decades of the internet

@Encarta_User07/18/2004 17:28I found this funnier than the animations in my encyclopedia.
@Terminator_T80001/21/2000 16:39I’ll be back... to read this again.
@Oracle_Says11/11/2006 21:20I knew you’d laugh at this.
@Trainspotting_Rent09/09/2007 07:34Choose life. Choose a joke.
@Chocolate_Rain08/12/2002 15:19I move away from the mic to breathe... and laugh.
@Delicious_Links03/05/2000 15:04Bookmarking this for later. So delicious!
@Habbo_Hotel_Bob07/05/2014 09:13The pool is closed... but the joke archive is open!
@Leet_Speaker_7711/21/1998 01:427h15 15 v3ry funny! 10v3 17!
@Mind_Blown_Gif01/26/2010 16:33*Boom* - there goes my brain!

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