Skip to content

The Retainer Fee

The upfront cost of a good (or bad) defense.

My lawyer told me my case was a slam dunk. Then I realized he was the one holding the hoop and charging me for the ball.

🔥 Top 10: The Lawyer Joke Archive: 1995–2025

47 Lawyer Jokes: The 2009 “Uber Disruption & App Store Anarchy” Edition
In 2009, "disruption" became the favorite word of people who didn...read more »
2025 Archive: The Meta-Liability
 A lawyer sued a user in the Metaverse for "virtual assault" afte...read more »
2025 Legacy: The Tech Support
 "Can you make my billing software compatible with my conscience?...read more »
52 Lawyer Jokes: The 2020 “Zoom Court & Force Majeure” Edition
In 2020, the legal world went remote. It was the year of the "Vir...read more »
2025 Vintage: The Negotiation
 A lawyer used a "Holographic Bluff." He made it look like he was...read more »
50 Lawyer Jokes: The 2014 “Alexa & The Frozen Tundra” Edition
In 2014, the legal world realized that "privacy" was officially a...read more »
The Small Town
Competition is the soul of the legal profession.A town with one l...read more »
53 Lawyer Jokes: The 2004 “Social Media & Search Engine IPO” Edition
In 2004, the legal landscape shifted forever. With the birth of F...read more »
2025 Legacy: The Internship
 The intern was happy. He was told he was a "Bio-Logic Validator,...read more »
The Two Hearts
Medical anomalies found only in the courtroom.A lawyer was in a c...read more »

😜 More from category: The Lawyer Joke Archive: 1995–2025

2025 Legacy: The TikTok Ban (Final)
 A lawyer cried when TikTok was banned because he lost his primar...read more »
The Witness Stand
A masterclass in asking the right questions at the wrong time."Is...read more »
48 Lawyer Jokes: The 2019 “Streaming Wars & Deepfake Debates” Edition
In 2019, "Content was King," but "Contracts were the Crown." It w...read more »
The 10% Rule
Math for beginners in the world of settlements.What do you call a...read more »

⏳ Time Capsule: This is how we rolled in the first two decades of the internet

@Zip_Drive_Owner08/16/2004 23:02Finally a joke worth 100MB of space!
@Sid_Meier_Fan01/03/1998 18:49Just one more joke... then I’ll go to sleep.
@StreetFighter_Ken06/04/1999 20:13Hadouken of a joke! Boom!
@Full_House_Lover05/04/2002 12:07You got it, dude! Hilarious.
@Titanic_Survivor01/28/2009 02:30I’ll never let go... of this joke.
@Gladiator_Maximus05/22/2008 16:32Are you not entertained? Because I am!
@Dial_Up_King04/02/2000 07:36Loading... 50%... 75%... HA! Worth the wait.
@Macarena_Dancer01/07/1999 21:25Ehhh Macarena! Funnier than the dance!
@Yugioh_Duelist02/20/2015 01:50You’ve activated my trap card! (It’s a funny joke).
@Sailor_Moon_Cry08/07/2003 00:23In the name of the moon, I will make you laugh!

Yearly Joke Archive

3 thoughts on “The Retainer Fee”

Leave a Reply

Human Humor: Eco

We use 0% cookies and no tracking. Saving energy and protecting your privacy.