Skip to content

The Bat Incident

The Osbournes TV show made Ozzy a pop-culture icon for his “mumbles.”

Ozzy Osbourne is trying to use a new voice-activated microwave. He stands in front of it and says, “Sharon! How do I… mumble mumble… make the… mumble… burrito hot?”
The microwave beeps and says: “I’m sorry, Ozzy. I can understand Spanish, French, and Japanese, but I still haven’t been programmed to translate ‘Rockstar Stutter.'”

🔥 Top 10: The Celebrity Joke Archive: 1995–2025

39 Celebrity Jokes: The 2001 “Low-Rise & Magic Wands” Edition
In 2001, the world got a lot bigger and a lot smaller at the same...read more »
The Tom Cruise & Nicole Kidman Split
When Tom and Nicole divorced, Nicole’s famous quote became the pu...read more »
2024 Archive: Glen Powell
 Why was he everywhere? Because in 2024, between Twisters and Hit...read more »
2024 Archive: Ryan Gosling at the Oscars
 Why was everything pink again? Because "I'm Just Ken" at the 202...read more »
The Eminem Phenomenon
Eminem's rise brought jokes about his aggressive lyrics and famil...read more »
2025 Classic: The End of 2025
 Why did the year feel like a fever dream? Because we spent the w...read more »
2025 Classic: JoJo Siwa’s New Look
 Why was she on Celebrity Big Brother? Because in 2025, JoJo deci...read more »
2025 Archive: Nicole Kidman & Keith Urban
 Why was the split so shocking? Because they were the "Final Boss...read more »
34 Celebrity Jokes: The 1997 “Near, Far, Wherever You Are” Edition
In 1997, the world was sinking—partly because of a giant iceberg ...read more »
33 Celebrity Jokes: The 2010 “Inception & Meat Dresses” Edition
In 2010, the world was spinning like Leonardo DiCaprio’s top. We ...read more »

😜 More from category: The Celebrity Joke Archive: 1995–2025

2025 Classic: Beyoncé’s Grammy Sweep
 Why was 2025 the year of "Justice at Last"? Because Beyoncé fina...read more »
36 Celebrity Jokes: The 2013 “Wrecking Balls & Ice Castles” Edition
In 2013, the world was divided into two groups: those who couldn'...read more »
2024 Classic: Katy Perry (Woman’s World)
 Why was the response so quiet? Because in 2024, the world realiz...read more »
The Michael Jackson Mystery
Michael Jackson visits an elementary school. He walks into a clas...read more »

⏳ Time Capsule: This is how we rolled in the first two decades of the internet

@Legally_Blonde_Paulette03/08/1995 09:17I’m taking the dog, dumbass! And the joke!
@DotCom_Survivor09/22/1999 08:11I lost my stocks but I kept my sense of humor.
@ODP_Editor_9902/16/2014 20:56Approved for the Open Directory Project!
@Arthas_Fan_0205/20/1995 23:12Succeeding you, father... in laughing!
@LonelyGirl15_F12/28/1999 14:25Is this a secret message? No, just a joke!

Yearly Joke Archive

Leave a Reply

Human Humor: Eco

We use 0% cookies and no tracking. Saving energy and protecting your privacy.