Making sure the family gets their fair share… of the bill.
Where there’s a will, there’s a lawyer checking to see if he’s in it.
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✓ HUMAN VERIFIED CONTENT
🔥 Top 10: The Lawyer Joke Archive: 1995–2025 Archive
1. 1995 Legacy: The Brief Encounter
What’s the difference between a lawyer and a vulture? The vulture doesn’t take his briefcase to ... read more »
What’s the difference between a lawyer and a vulture? The vulture doesn’t take his briefcase to ... read more »
2. 2020 Legacy: The Instagram Reels Launch
Why did the lawyer sue Instagram? For "copyright infringement of his 2016 TikTok lawsuit."Part o... read more »
Why did the lawyer sue Instagram? For "copyright infringement of his 2016 TikTok lawsuit."Part o... read more »
3. 2005 Archive: The 2005 Legacy
What’s the most 2005 thing a lawyer did? He billed a client for "Time spent explaining why their... read more »
What’s the most 2005 thing a lawyer did? He billed a client for "Time spent explaining why their... read more »
4. 2003 Legacy: The Retainer Fee
Why did the lawyer call it a "Da Vinci Retainer"? Because the way he spent it was a complete mys... read more »
Why did the lawyer call it a "Da Vinci Retainer"? Because the way he spent it was a complete mys... read more »
5. 1995 Classic: The Jury Selection
Why did the lawyer wear a tracksuit to court? He heard it was a "running" objection.Part of the ... read more »
Why did the lawyer wear a tracksuit to court? He heard it was a "running" objection.Part of the ... read more »
6. 1999 Classic: The Retainer Fee
Why did the lawyer call it a "Millennium Retainer"? Because it was designed to last until the ye... read more »
Why did the lawyer call it a "Millennium Retainer"? Because it was designed to last until the ye... read more »
7. 2009 Vintage: The 2009 Verdict
Why do lawyers love 2009? Because in a world of "apps," everyone is just one "Update" away from ... read more »
Why do lawyers love 2009? Because in a world of "apps," everyone is just one "Update" away from ... read more »
8. 2020 Archive: The Negotiation
Why did the lawyer "accidentally" leave his microphone on? To let the other side hear how much h... read more »
Why did the lawyer "accidentally" leave his microphone on? To let the other side hear how much h... read more »
9. 2024 Legacy: The Internship
The intern was sad. They were told they’d be "training AI," which meant manually typing "This is... read more »
The intern was sad. They were told they’d be "training AI," which meant manually typing "This is... read more »
10. 2015 Legacy: The Power Move
Why did the lawyer wear two Apple Watches? One for his "Billable Heartbeats" and one for the "Cl... read more »
Why did the lawyer wear two Apple Watches? One for his "Billable Heartbeats" and one for the "Cl... read more »
Warning: More Bad Jokes Ahead
Our Comment Archive
[1995-05-20 ARCHIVE_LOG]Zelda_Link: It’s dangerous to go alone! Take this joke.
[2009-06-28 ARCHIVE_LOG]Gopher_Explorer: Deep in the menus and found this gem.
[2007-11-04 ARCHIVE_LOG]Scream_Fan_96: What’s your favorite funny joke? This one!
[2009-08-03 ARCHIVE_LOG]Pager_Guy: Paging emergency services because I’m dying of laughter!
[2006-04-04 ARCHIVE_LOG]Harry_Potter_Ron: Bloody brilliant, mate!
[2009-11-18 ARCHIVE_LOG]Agent_Smith_01: It is inevitable... you will laugh.
[1996-08-10 ARCHIVE_LOG]Wayne_World_Ex: Schwing! This joke is babe-worthy!
[1998-06-29 ARCHIVE_LOG]GL_HF_Runner: Good Luck, Have Fun... and read jokes!
[2000-11-16 ARCHIVE_LOG]Influencer_99: My followers need to see this!
TOTAL VERIFIED VIEWS: 1,445,178
[ DATA SYNCED WITH 1995-2025 LEGACY DATABASE ]
[ DATA SYNCED WITH 1995-2025 LEGACY DATABASE ]
i’m gonna use this as an icebreaker. wish me luck!
wait, let me read that again… okay, now i got it. haha.
this is peak internet. thank u for keeping it simple and funny.