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Home » The Lawyer Joke Archive: 1995–2025 » 2016 Classic: The Divorce Settlement

2016 Classic: The Divorce Settlement

 Why did the lawyer get the Netflix password? Because he proved he was the only one who didn’t share it with “unauthorized third parties.”

Part of the 47 Lawyer Jokes: The 2016 “Gotta Sue ‘Em All” Edition archive. Historically Verified

🔥 Top 10: The Lawyer Joke Archive: 1995–2025

2025 Archive: The Inheritance
 A lawyer brought a 3D-scanner to the funeral to "mint" the decea...read more »
The Witness Stand
A masterclass in asking the right questions at the wrong time."Is...read more »
2025 Legacy: The 2025 Legacy
 The most 2025 thing a lawyer did was bill a client for "Time spe...read more »
The Copper Wire
An invention born from the ultimate tug-of-war over a penny.How w...read more »
2025 Vintage: The Final Word
 A lawyer crossed the road to bill the chicken for "Navigational ...read more »
2025 Archive: The Robot Associate
 Why did the robot associate quit? It realized that even with a p...read more »
2025 Archive: The Library
 A lawyer sued the library for having "Free Knowledge" when he wa...read more »
2025 Legacy: The Speeding Ticket
 A lawyer argued with a self-driving car's black box. He claimed ...read more »
48 Lawyer Jokes: The 2002 “SOX Compliance & Reality TV” Edition
In 2002, "accountability" became the new buzzword, which ironical...read more »
49 Lawyer Jokes: The 2023 “Prompt Engineering & Hallucination” Edition
In 2023, the legal profession realized that the "Bar Exam" might ...read more »

😜 More from category: The Lawyer Joke Archive: 1995–2025

2025 Classic: The Coffee Price
 A lawyer sued the $30 "Robot-Pressed" coffee. He argued the robo...read more »
The Lab Rat Switch
Science makes a practical adjustment for the sake of humanity.A r...read more »
The Jury Duty
Twelve people picked to decide who has the better suit.A jury con...read more »
2025 Legacy: The Internship
 The intern was happy. He was told he was a "Bio-Logic Validator,...read more »

⏳ Time Capsule: This is how we rolled in the first two decades of the internet

@Pager_Guy08/02/1998 16:35Paging emergency services because I’m dying of laughter!
@SimCity_Mayor04/18/2008 20:20Reticulating splines... and laughing hard!
@Hackers_Movie_Fan12/26/2008 11:05Hack the planet! And read the jokes!
@Ghostbusters_V10/15/1995 18:56Who you gonna call? Joke-busters!
@Fat_Bastard_Get04/17/2003 16:24Get in my belly! (The joke, I mean).
@Distracted_Boy09/17/2012 00:55Looking at this joke while my girlfriend stares at me.
@This_Is_Fine_Dog06/27/2004 22:24Everything is fine. I’m just laughing.
@Web_Crawler_9604/11/2008 21:25Crawled my way to this hilarious page.
@Slashdot_Effect08/10/1999 01:40We’re crashing the server with all these laughs!

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