2020 Classic: The Best Original Song
Why did Elton John win? Because even at 72, he’s still standing, still winning, and still wearing the best glasses in the room. Part of… Read More »2020 Classic: The Best Original Song
2020 Classic: The Old Fashioned
“A drink for a man who remembers when you could see people’s mouths.” Part of the 55 Bar Jokes: The 2020 “Quarantine & Zoom Bar”… Read More »2020 Classic: The Old Fashioned
2019 Vintage: Best Pop Duo/Group Performance
Why “Shallow”? Because Bradley Cooper discovered that singing with Gaga is the best way to get a Grammy without being a singer. Part of the… Read More »2019 Vintage: Best Pop Duo/Group Performance
2019 Legacy: The Peloton Ad
Why did the lawyer represent the “Peloton Wife”? To sue the husband for “intentional infliction of fitness-related anxiety.” Part of the 48 Lawyer Jokes: The… Read More »2019 Legacy: The Peloton Ad
2018 Legacy: The “Truth or Dare” Burn
Why? For a horror movie where the scariest thing was the CGI “evil grins” that looked like SnapChat filters. Part of the 36 Razzie Awards… Read More »2018 Legacy: The “Truth or Dare” Burn
2018 Classic: The Sheep
I’m “following” the streamers. Part of the 126 Classic Punny One-Liners: The Snap & Battle Royale Edition (2018) archive. Historically Verified
2018 Classic: The Snap
She doesn’t need Infinity Stones to make me disappear. She just starts talking about “family traditions” and I vanish into the garage. Part of the… Read More »2018 Classic: The Snap
2017 Vintage: The Moonlight-gate Finale
Why did La La Land have the shortest Best Picture reign in history? Because in 2017, the Academy decided to experiment with a “New Minute”… Read More »2017 Vintage: The Moonlight-gate Finale
2017 Legacy: The Animoji Memo
Why did the CEO’s announcement look like a talking poop emoji? Because he discovered Animoji on his iPhone X and thought it was a “relatable”… Read More »2017 Legacy: The Animoji Memo
2016 Classic: The Dog
I’m “barking” up the right PokeStop. Part of the 130 Classic Punny One-Liners: The Pokémon GO & Bottle Flip Edition (2016) archive. Historically Verified