72 Light Bulb Jokes: 2004 – The Social Network Spark

In 2004, the world changed forever when a small site called “TheFacebook” launched in a dorm room. It was the year of Mean Girls, the final episode of Friends, and the massive success of Shrek 2. We were all wearing Livestrong bracelets, voting for our favorite American Idol, and wondering if the “Motorola Razr” was the peak of human engineering. The humor of 2004 is trendy, snarky, and very “pink.”

The 2004 Top 10: Burned-Out Burn Book

1. The Mean Girl: “You can’t sit with us… because it’s too dark and your bulb is vintage.”
2. The Regina George: “Get in, loser. We’re going to Home Depot.”
3. The Motorola Razr Owner: One, but they have to snap the bulb shut after every turn.
4. The Facebook User: One, but they have to “Poke” the socket first and add the ladder as a friend.
5. The Napoleon Dynamite: “Gosh! It’s taking me like infinity years to screw this in! Idiots!”
6. The Usher Fan: “Yeah! Yeah! …In the dark, in the dark!”
7. The Shrek 2 Fan: “Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Is the bulb in yet?”
8. The “Friends” Fan: None. They’re too busy crying because the show just ended and nobody told them life was gonna be this way.
9. The Spider-Man 2 Fan: “Pizza time! …Wait, I can’t see the pizza.”
10. The Lost Fan: One, but the bulb keeps flickering the numbers 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42.

The Full 2004 Archive (Extended List)

11. The Gwen Stefani Fan: “This bulb is bananas! B-A-N-A-N-A-S!”
12. The Incredibles Fan: “Honey? Where is my super-bulb?!”
13. The Green Day Fan: “I walk a lonely road… because I can’t find the light switch.”
14. The Lindsay Lohan Fan: One, but the bulb is a “Rumor” and it’s about to break.
15. The Maroon 5 Fan: “She will be loved… as soon as I fix the lighting.”
16. The Killers Fan: “Coming out of my cage and I’ve been doing just fine… until the bulb blew.”
17. The Snoop Dogg Fan: “Drop it like it’s hot… especially if the bulb just burned out.”
18. The Livestrong Supporter: One, but they have to wear a yellow rubber band on their wrist while doing it.
19. The Nintendo DS Player: One, but you have to blow into the socket to make it work.
20. The Anchorman: “I’m kind of a big deal. People know me. I have many leather-bound books and my light works.”
21. The Kanye West (College Dropout) Fan: One, but the bulb is a genius and it knows it.
22. The Kelly Clarkson Fan: “Since u been gone… I can’t breathe… and it’s dark.”
23. The Dodgeball Player: “If you can dodge a wrench, you can change a bulb!”
24. The National Treasure Fan: One, but the instructions are written in invisible ink on the back of the Declaration of Independence.
25. The Hoobastank Fan: “I’m not a perfect person… I’m not a perfect light bulb changer.”
26. The Ashlee Simpson Fan: One, but it’s actually just a recording of a bulb being changed.
27. The GTA: San Andreas Player: “All we had to do was follow the damn train, CJ! Not sit in the dark!”
28. The World of Warcraft Player: One, but they have to grind for 40 hours to get the “Legendary 60-Watt” drop.
29. The iPod Mini Owner: One, but the bulb comes in five metallic colors.
30. The MySpace Scene Kid: One, but they have to take a selfie with the ladder from a high angle.
31. The OutKast (The Way You Move) Fan: “I love the way you move… into the socket.”
32. The “O.C.” Fan: “California… here we come… back to the dark.”
33. The Scientist: “We’ve landed a rover on Saturn’s moon, but my hallway is still pitch black.”
34. The Librarian: “Shhh! I’m trying to categorize the shadows.”
35. The Gym Teacher: “If you can’t reach the bulb, do 15 burpees!”
36. The Chef: “I’ll change it, but it needs a drizzle of truffle oil.”
37. The Optimist: “Now I have an excuse to go to bed early!”
38. The Pessimist: “The darkness is just the universe’s default setting.”
39. The Pro-Wrestler: One, but they have to give the ladder a “FU” (Attitude Adjustment).
40. The Detective: “The bulb was clearly tampered with. Look at these smudge marks.”
41. The Tourist: “Is this the original socket from the 1900s?”
42. The Reality Producer: “Can we make the bulb-changing feel more like a ‘Simple Life’ episode?”
43. The Bodybuilder: “I’m not changing it, I’m just doing overhead presses with the fixture.”
44. The Sailor: “A dark room is just a sea without waves.”
45. The Poet: “The light has departed, like a summer friend.”
46. The Bus Driver: “Step behind the line! I can’t see the road in this dark!”
47. The Ghost: “I liked the old bulb. It had more ‘phantom’ power.”
48. The 2004 Legend: One, but they do it while wearing a Von Dutch hat and a polo shirt with the collar popped.
49. The Starbucks Fan: “I’ll have a Pumpkin Spice Bulb, please.”
50. The American Next Top Model: “You’re still in the running towards becoming America’s Next Top Light Bulb.”
51. The Saw Fan: “I want to play a game… find the spare bulb in this room of saws.”
52. The Franz Ferdinand Fan: “Take me out! …Because I’m a burnt-out bulb.”
53. The Ciara Fan: “One, two step… up the ladder.”
54. The Jet Fan: “Are you gonna be my bulb?”
55. The Keane Fan: “Is this the place we used to love? It’s much darker now.”
56. The Shark Tale Fan: One, but the bulb is a “mobster” fish.
57. The Polar Express Fan: One, but you have to believe in the bulb for it to light up.
58. The Million Dollar Baby Fan: One, but it’s a real knockout.
59. The Eternal Sunshine Fan: They don’t change the bulb; they just erase the memory of ever having light.
60. The Troy Fan: One, but it takes 1,000 ships to deliver the replacement.
61. The Hellboy Fan: One, but he uses his “Right Hand of Doom” and breaks the whole ceiling.
62. The 13 Going on 30 Fan: One, but they’re “thirty, flirty, and thriving” in the dark.
63. The Phantom of the Opera Fan: One, but they have to sing a dramatic duet with the socket.
64. The Catwoman (Movie) Fan: One, but they do it while eating a bowl of tuna.
65. The Barbie as the Princess and the Pauper Fan: Two. One to screw it in, and one to sing the harmony.
66. The JoJo Fan: “Get out (leave)… right now… it’s too dark in this house.”
67. The Terror Squad Fan: “Lean back, lean back… while I reach for the bulb.”
68. The Scissor Sisters Fan: “I don’t feel like dancin’… until the light comes back.”
69. The Snow Patrol Fan: “If I lay here, if I just lay here… will the light come back on?”
70. The Ray (Movie) Fan: They don’t need the light to play the piano.
71. The Enzyte Guy: “One, but it gives the bulb ‘Great Expectations’.”
72. The 2004 Icon: One, but they do it while wearing shutter shades and listening to a U2 special edition iPod.