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Home » The Military Joke Archive: 1995–2025 » 2023 Classic: The “Zumwalt” Hypersonic Upgrade

2023 Classic: The “Zumwalt” Hypersonic Upgrade

Why? Because the Navy finally admitted the “Guns with no ammo” were just very expensive “Decorative Rails.”

Part of the 36 Military Jokes: The 2023 “FPV Frenzy & Wagner’s Road Trip” Edition archive. Historically Verified

🔥 Top 10: The Military Joke Archive: 1995–2025

2025 Classic: The "Night Vision" White Phosphor Gen 4
Why the demand? Because it makes the "World of 2025" look like a ...read more »
2025 Legacy: The MRE "Synthesized Steak"
Why did it taste like plastic? Because in 2025, even the food is ...read more »
2025 Archive: The "Information Operations" AI-Deepfakes
Why the confusion? Because in 2025, you’re not sure if the Genera...read more »
2025 Classic: The "Combat Camera" Swarm View
Why the "Hive" perspective? To make sure the taxpayers feel like ...read more »
2024 Archive: The "Coalition" of the Shells
Why the Czech initiative? Because finding 800,000 artillery shell...read more »
2025 Vintage: The "Ghost Fleet" Expansion
Why did the Navy build ships with no kitchens? Because in 2025, i...read more »
2025 Archive: The "Virtual" Veteran
Why was the 2025 parade on the "Metaverse"? Because it’s the only...read more »
37 Military Jokes: The 2004 “Hillbilly Armor & Urban Grinder” Edition
In 2004, the "Mission Accomplished" vibe officially evaporated, r...read more »
2025 Legacy: The "Quantum" Encryption Race
Why was the 2025 briefing so secret? Because we finally realized ...read more »
2025 Archive: The "Nuclear" AI-Trigger
Why the debate? Because we’re not sure if giving the "Red Button"...read more »

😜 More from category: The Military Joke Archive: 1995–2025

2024 Classic: The "Total Force" Burnout
Why the Guard? Because they’ve spent more time on "Active Duty" i...read more »
34 Military Jokes: The 2002 “Axis of Evil & Anaconda Boots” Edition
In 2002, the military was busy trying to find a needle in a hayst...read more »
36 Military Jokes: The 2023 “FPV Frenzy & Wagner’s Road Trip” Edition
In 2023, the military realized that the "Future of War" costs abo...read more »
2025 Archive: The "Transformation" of the Marine Corps (Final Form)
Why only drones? To prove that a Marine’s "Aggression" can be per...read more »

⏳ Time Capsule: This is how we rolled in the first two decades of the internet

@CoolSkater9807/03/2000 23:44Totally radical! Sending this to my buddy on AIM.
@Hotmail_Checker05/01/2002 08:45Checking my mail at the library and laughing out loud!
@Msdos_Expert08/27/1996 23:29DIR /W /P... found the joke directory!
@Myspace_First_Friend04/05/2010 23:22I’m Tom and I think this joke is cool!
@Zoolander_Mug10/12/2002 11:30I’m a merman! A merman laughing!
@First_World_P08/15/2006 12:08My internet is too fast to appreciate the loading bar. LOL.
@Spawn_Camper_J08/24/1997 12:38I’m staying right here until I read every joke.
@Retro_End_User12/24/1996 15:08The archive is complete! 10/10 would laugh again.

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