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Home » The Military Joke Archive: 1995–2025 » 2017 Vintage: The USS Fitzgerald & John S. McCain Collisions

2017 Vintage: The USS Fitzgerald & John S. McCain Collisions

Why was the Navy sweating in 2017? Because it turns out that “Mastering the Oceans” is much harder when your multi-billion dollar destroyers can’t avoid a giant, slow-moving cargo ship full of Toyotas.

Part of the 34 Military Jokes: The 2017 “Mother of All Bombs & Fire and Fury” Edition archive. Historically Verified

🔥 Top 10: The Military Joke Archive: 1995–2025

38 Military Jokes: The 2011 “Stealth Hawks & Arab Springs” Edition
In 2011, the military realized that "History" doesn't just happen...read more »
2024 Legacy: The MRE "Pizza" (2024 Patch)
Why is it still the baseline? Because in a world of AI and hypers...read more »
2024 Archive: The "Information Operations" AI-Wars
Why 2024? Because "Propaganda" is now 90% bots arguing with other...read more »
2024 Archive: The "Russian" Tank Production
Why the T-62s? To prove that "Vintage" is a legitimate tactical c...read more »
2024 Classic: The "Stryker" Anti-Drone Cage
Why the "Birdhouse" look? To prove that the best defense against ...read more »
2025 Classic: The "Bio-Metric" ID 2025
Why the DNA scan? To make sure you’re actually a "Human" and not ...read more »
2024 Vintage: The "Cyber" Awareness 2024
Why the panic? Because we realized that "Smart Toasters" in the b...read more »
35 Military Jokes: The 2024 “Thermite Dragons & Jamming Junkies” Edition
In 2024, the military realized that if your equipment isn't "EW-H...read more »
2024 Vintage: The "Targeting" Pod (Sniper Gen 10)
Why the 12K upgrade? To see if the enemy soldier is using a "Pro"...read more »
2025 Archive: The "Strategic" Silence on Mars
Why so quiet? Because the first rule of "Martian Recon" is that w...read more »

😜 More from category: The Military Joke Archive: 1995–2025

2024 Vintage: The "Blueberry" Navy Ghost (2024)
Why did I see one? Because some Sailors are convinced that if the...read more »
2025 Vintage: The "Laser" Point-Defense
Why the "Pew-Pew" sounds? Because the Air Force realized that if ...read more »
35 Military Jokes: The 2000 “New Millennium & Old Problems” Edition
In 2000, the world breathed a sigh of relief because the computer...read more »
39 Military Jokes: The 2003 “Shock, Awe & Mission (Un)accomplished” Edition
In 2003, the military proved it could conquer a country in three ...read more »

⏳ Time Capsule: This is how we rolled in the first two decades of the internet

@Requiem_Dreamer06/04/2007 16:20That was intense... and funny!
@Reservoir_Joe11/23/2010 10:45Professional humor for professional people.
@Brick_Tamland_L12/23/2010 22:29I love lamp. And I love this joke.
@Philosoraptor_X11/05/2015 04:25If a joke is told in a forest... does it still get a LOL?
@Distracted_Boy12/05/2004 20:51Looking at this joke while my girlfriend stares at me.
@Face_Palm_0109/28/2009 11:28Classic. Simply classic.

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