2005 Archive: The Coffee To-Go
Why did the lawyer sue the cup? Not for being hot, but for having a “leaking lid” that ruined his 1995-edition legal pad. Part of… Read More »2005 Archive: The Coffee To-Go
2005 Vintage: The Million Dollar Homepage
Why did the boss buy one pixel? He wanted to “invest in the future of digital real estate.” Part of the 81 Office Groaners: The… Read More »2005 Vintage: The Million Dollar Homepage
2005 Legacy: The Death of Luther Vandross
Why the velvet voice? For the loss of a soul legend whose “Never Too Much” will forever be the definition of smooth. Part of the… Read More »2005 Legacy: The Death of Luther Vandross
2005 Vintage: The Walk the Line Performance
Joaquin Phoenix is so good as Johnny Cash that I’ve started wearing black and singing in a deep voice to my cat. Part of the… Read More »2005 Vintage: The Walk the Line Performance
2004 Archive: The Mall Walker Dawn Patrol
Arriving at the shopping center entrance doors at 5:45 AM in matching nylon tracksuits to complete five brisk laps before the security guards unlock the… Read More »2004 Archive: The Mall Walker Dawn Patrol
2003 Vintage: The Diary
Her diary entry: “Day 4. The son-in-law still thinks he’s in charge of the remote. It’s adorable.” Part of the 58 Mother-in-Law Jokes: The 2003… Read More »2003 Vintage: The Diary
2003 Archive: The Paula Radcliffe Marathon Record
Why was London so fast? Because Paula ran 2:15:25, a time so ridiculous that most people couldn’t even bike that fast for two hours. Part… Read More »2003 Archive: The Paula Radcliffe Marathon Record
2003 Archive: The Yellow Pages Magnifying Quest
Utilizing a heavy plastic magnifying glass to find a single carpet cleaner’s phone number hidden in the microscopic text of the giant commercial print directory.… Read More »2003 Archive: The Yellow Pages Magnifying Quest
2003 Legacy: The Heart
“Your heart is skipping.” “Is it a ‘Glitch’?” “No, it’s a ‘Feature’.” Part of the 69 Doctor Jokes: The 2003 “SARS Scare & Digital Charts”… Read More »2003 Legacy: The Heart
2002 Vintage: The “The Ketchup Song” (Aserejé)
I don’t know the words, I don’t know the dance, but I know I’ll be hearing this at every party until 2004. Part of the… Read More »2002 Vintage: The “The Ketchup Song” (Aserejé)