2018 Legacy: The Deadpool 2
I told her I’m part of the X-Force. She said, “The ‘Ex-Force’—the force that makes me want to be your ‘Ex’.” Part of the 66… Read More »2018 Legacy: The Deadpool 2
2017 Vintage: The Daddy’s Home 2
I told her I’m the cool dad. She said, “The cool dad doesn’t wear socks with sandals to the beach.” Part of the 62 Marriage… Read More »2017 Vintage: The Daddy’s Home 2
2016 Vintage: The Starbucks Unicorn Frappuccino
Why was the drink so colorful? Because 2016 was the year we decided that “sugar and pink dye” was a valid breakfast. Part of the… Read More »2016 Vintage: The Starbucks Unicorn Frappuccino
2016 Archive: The Shawn Mendes
“Treat You Better.” I sang this to her. She said, “Then start by treating me to a dinner that isn’t from a drive-thru.” Part of… Read More »2016 Archive: The Shawn Mendes
2014 Legacy: The 50 Shades Trailer
It dropped. My wife is “anticipating.” I told her I bought some new rope. She got excited until she realized it was for the lawnmower… Read More »2014 Legacy: The 50 Shades Trailer
2014 Archive: The Interstellar
A guy orders a drink and says, “I’ll be back in five minutes.” He comes back three hours later. The bartender says, “You’re late.” The… Read More »2014 Archive: The Interstellar
2014 Legacy: The Theodore
Knock, knock. / Who’s there? / Theodore. / Theodore who? / Theodore is shut tight! Part of the 47 Classic Knock-Knock Jokes: The 2014 Happy… Read More »2014 Legacy: The Theodore
2012 Classic: The Amazing Race’s 9th Win
Why? Because watching people argue over a map in a foreign country is the only thing that unites all Americans. Part of the 39 Emmy… Read More »2012 Classic: The Amazing Race’s 9th Win
2012 Legacy: The Choice
“Should we get a 3D TV?” “The world might end in two weeks.” “Good point, let’s just buy more wine.” Part of the 63 Marriage… Read More »2012 Legacy: The Choice
2011 Legacy: The Minecraft Creeper
Why was the gamer nervous near the engine? Because he heard a “Hissing” sound and expected his row to explode into green pixels. Part of… Read More »2011 Legacy: The Minecraft Creeper