62 Classic Blonde Jokes: The 2020 Pandemic Edition

The 2020 Top 10: Golden Classics

1. The Zoom Meeting: Why did the blonde wear a ball gown to her Tuesday morning staff meeting? She heard the call was on “Zoom” and thought she was attending a Hollywood red carpet premiere.
2. The Social Distancing: Why did the blonde bring a 6-foot long sandwich to the grocery store? She heard about “social distancing” and thought it was a new way to measure her snacks while waiting in line.
3. The Tiger King: Why did the blonde try to paint her house cat orange and black? She watched “Tiger King” and thought Joe Exotic was giving a DIY tutorial on home-office security.
4. The Toilet Paper Panic: Why did the blonde build a fort out of 500 rolls of toilet paper? She heard the “wipe-out” of the economy was coming and wanted to be physically protected.
5. The Hand Sanitizer: Why did the blonde try to use hand sanitizer to clean her hard drive? She heard her computer had a “new virus” and wanted to make sure it was 99.9% germ-free.
6. The Quarantine Baking: Why did the blonde stare at her sourdough starter for three days? She heard it was “alive” and was waiting for it to say its first word.
7. The Home Workout: Why did the blonde try to do a marathon in her bathtub? She saw people doing “indoor challenges” and thought “cross-training” meant crossing from the tap to the drain.
8. The Face Mask: Why did the blonde put a tiny mask on her iPhone? She heard about “Face ID” and didn’t want her phone to catch anything while she was texting.
9. The Animal Crossing: Why did the blonde try to pay her real rent with a bag of sea shells? She played too much “Animal Crossing” and thought Tom Nook had taken over the real estate market.
10. The Mute Button: Why did the blonde keep talking to her goldfish for an hour? She thought she was on a Zoom call and that the fish had “muted” her.

The Full 2020 Archive (Extended List)

11. The Mouse: Why did the blonde give her mouse a piece of cheese? She thought it was “hungry” for more gigabytes.
12. The Keyboard: Why did the blonde put a bandage on her keyboard? She heard she had a “stuck” key.
13. The Monitor: Why did the blonde put sunglasses on her monitor? She said the “Windows” were too bright today.
14. The Printer: Why did the blonde put a mirror in front of the printer? She wanted to see a “double” printout.
15. The Scanner: Why did the blonde put a picture of her face on the scanner? She wanted to “face” her digital problems.
16. The Email: Why did the blonde keep her computer in the freezer? She was waiting for “cool” mail.
17. The Password: Why did the blonde change her password to “Incorrect”? Because the computer kept telling her the old one was “incorrect.”
18. The Desktop: Why did the blonde put a glass of water on her desktop? She wanted to see the “liquid” in the LCD screen.
19. The Icon: Why did the blonde think her computer was a church? It had so many “icons” on the screen.
20. The Folder: Why did the blonde put a real folder on her monitor? She wanted to “organize” her desktop files.
21. The Link: Why did the blonde bring a chain to the computer? She heard there were “broken links.”
22. The Virus: Why did the blonde give her computer a glass of orange juice? She heard there was a “new virus” going around.
23. The CD: Why did the blonde use her CD as a frisbee? She wanted to “transfer” data to her friend across the street.
24. The Search: Why did the blonde use a magnifying glass on her screen? She was “searching” for the home page.
25. The Scroll: Why did the blonde bring a rolling pin to the computer? She heard she needed to “scroll” down the page.
26. The Font: Why did the blonde change her font to “Arial”? She wanted her text to have “more air.”
27. The Port: Why did the blonde bring a suitcase to her computer? She heard it had a “USB port.”
28. The Bit: Why did the blonde bite her computer? She wanted to see if it had 32 “bits.”
29. The Chip: Why did the blonde put a potato chip in her computer? She heard it needed a “microchip.”
30. The Fan: Why did the blonde bring a pom-pom to her computer? She wanted to be a “fan” of the cooling system.
31. The RAM: Why did the blonde bring a sheep to the office? She heard the computer needed more “RAM” for the new software.
32. The Hard Drive: Why did the blonde take her computer for a long walk? She wanted to give it a “hard drive.”
33. The Firewall: Why did the blonde bring a fire extinguisher to the computer? She heard it had a “firewall.”
34. The Buffer: Why did the blonde bring a car wax? She heard the video was “buffering.”
35. The Cookies: Why did the blonde look inside her computer? She was looking for the “cookies” the websites promised her.
36. The Crash: Why did the blonde call a tow truck? Her computer “crashed” on the information highway.
37. The Java: Why did the blonde pour coffee on her mouse? She wanted to use “Java.”
38. The Bug: Why did the blonde use bug spray on her screen? She heard there was a “software bug.”
39. The Bookmark: Why did the blonde put a post-it note on her monitor? She wanted to “bookmark” a site.
40. The Refresh: Why did the blonde splash water on her face? She clicked “Refresh” on her browser.
41. The Home Office: Why did the blonde put her desk in the shower? She heard about “streamlining” her workflow.
42. The 5G Tower: Why did the blonde wear a tinfoil hat to bed? She heard the 5G towers were trying to “upload” dreams.
43. The Netflix: Why did the blonde bring a pillow to the computer? She heard about “Netflix and chill.”
44. The Bitcoin: Why did the blonde try to polish her hard drive? She heard Bitcoins were “digital gold.”
45. The Smart TV: Why did the blonde ask her TV for advice? She heard it was a “Smart TV.”
46. The Wearables: Why did the blonde try to wear her laptop as a hat? She heard “wearable tech” was the new fashion.
47. The TikTok: Why did the blonde dance in front of her microwave? She thought the “timer” was a countdown for a viral challenge.
48. The Delivery: Why did the blonde wait by the door for a week? She ordered “digital downloads” and thought they were coming by truck.
49. The QR Code: Why did the blonde try to scan her checkered shirt? She thought she was a giant “QR code” for a discount.
50. The Podcast: Why did the blonde put her phone in a pea pod? She wanted to start a “pod-cast.”
51. The Cloud: Why did the blonde put her phone in a bag of cotton candy? She heard it was “Cloud storage.”
52. The Selfie: Why did the blonde try to take a photo of her brain? She heard it was the only way to prove it was still “online.”
53. The 4K Video: Why did the blonde put four keys on her monitor? She heard she was watching a “4K” video.
54. The Drone: Why did the blonde throw her phone in the air? She heard about “drone photography” and wanted to try it out.
55. The E-Book: Why did the blonde try to charge her paperback? She thought it was an “E-book.”
56. The App Store: Why did the blonde try to buy an apple at the computer store? She heard an “App Store” was coming and thought it was a grocery shop.
57. The YouTube High: Why did the blonde climb a ladder to watch a video? She heard it was “High-Definition.”
58. The GPS Voice: Why did the blonde argue with her car? She heard the GPS say “Recalculating” and thought it was criticizing her math skills.
59. The Touchscreen: Why did the blonde keep pressing her TV screen? She thought every screen was now an iPad.
60. The Tablet: Why did the blonde try to write on her monitor with a pencil? She heard “tablet PCs” were the new thing.
61. The Webcam: Why did the blonde wave at the ATM? She thought it was a “webcam” and her bank was watching.
62. The End: Why did the blonde think 2020 was a “viral” year? Because she spent the whole time trying to find out if she could “download” a vaccine through her Wi-Fi!