35 Halloween Jokes: The 2022 “Wednesday & The Slap” Edition

In 2022, Halloween was a masterclass in viral choreography and cinematic comebacks. We were busy “doing the dance” with our hands, flying at Mach 10 with Maverick, and checking if any spit actually landed on Chris Pine.

The 2022 Top 10: “Thing, Corn & Negroni Sbagliato”

1. Wednesday (Netflix): Why was every 2022 party full of girls in black braids doing a stiff, rhythmic dance? Because Jenna Ortega made being a “macabre outcast” the coolest vibe of the year, and “Goo Goo Muck” was the only song that mattered.
2. The Slap (Oscars): What was the scariest “trick” of 2022? Walking up to someone and realizing that keepin’ someone’s name out of your mouth was a matter of national security after the Will Smith incident.
3. Top Gun: Maverick: Why was the 2022 vampire wearing aviators and a flight suit? Because Tom Cruise showed us that you’re never too old to fly a jet through a needle’s eye and save the summer box office.
4. The “It’s Corn!” Kid: Why was the trick-or-treater so obsessed with a vegetable? “It’s corn! A big lump with knobs! It has the juice!”—the most wholesome and catchy interview of 2022.
5. Stranger Things 4 (Eddie Munson): Why was the guy on the roof playing a guitar solo? Because “Chrissy, wake up!” was the meme, and Eddie Munson died a hero while shredded Metallica in the Upside Down.
6. Negroni Sbagliato… with Prosecco in it: Why was the witch ordering such a specific drink? Because Emma D’Arcy from House of the Dragon said it once, and suddenly everyone was a sophisticated mixologist.
7. Don’t Worry Darling (Spitgate): Why were the guests at the party staring at Harry Styles’ mouth? To see if he actually spat on Chris Pine, or if the internet just needed a 48-hour distraction from reality.
8. The Queen’s Passing: Why was the 2022 Halloween mood so British and somber? Because an era ended after 70 years, and suddenly everyone felt the need to talk about corgis and Paddington Bear.
9. Elon Musk buys Twitter: What was the scariest “Blue Checkmark” costume? A ghost carrying a sink into an office and tweeting, “Let that sink in!” while firing half the graveyard staff.
10. The Wordle Obsession: Why was the ghost staring at five green squares? Because he finally found a 5-letter word for “Haunt” and didn’t want to ruin his 200-day streak.

The Full 2022 Halloween Jokes Archive

11. The Batman: Why was the 2022 superhero so emo and wearing eyeliner? Because Robert Pattinson’s Batman only worked in the shadows and listened to Nirvana on loop.
12. The “Little Miss” Memes: Why did the witch have a sign that said “Little Miss Always Late to the Coven”? Because in 2022, we all diagnosed our personalities with colorful storybook characters.
13. Elvis: Why was the ghost shaking his hips and saying “Thank you very much”? Because Austin Butler’s voice got stuck like that forever, and we were all caught in a trap.
14. Barbie (Set Photos Hype): Why were there so many people in neon pink spandex and rollerblades? Because the first photos of Margot Robbie and Ryan Gosling leaked, and “Barbiecore” became a religion.
15. The Bear: Why was the chef ghost shouting “YES CHEF!” in the kitchen? Because Jeremy Allen White made high-stress sandwich making the most intense drama of the summer.
16. Smile: Why was the girl in the background staring at the camera with a terrifying, frozen grin? Because the marketing for this movie was so good, we were all afraid of anyone being too happy.
17. Euphoria (Season 2): Why was the high school costume so full of glitter and existential dread? Because Cassie was “crazy” and Maddy was “iconic,” and the bathroom scene was a horror movie in itself.
18. The “He’s a 10 but…” Trend: Why was the vampire only an 8? Because “He’s a 10, but he sleeps in a coffin and hasn’t checked his DMs since 1894.”
19. Glass Onion: Why was the detective wearing a linen suit on a private island? Because Benoit Blanc was back to peel away the layers of a mystery involving a very expensive “disruptor.”
20. Minions: The Rise of Gru (GentleMinions): Why were there teenagers in full suits at the movie theater? Because they were “GentleMinions” and they took their yellow-pill fandom very seriously.
21. House of the Dragon: Why was everyone arguing about blonde wigs and giant lizards? Because the Targaryens were back, and “Dracarys” was the only way to light the Halloween bonfire.
22. The “Pink Sauce” Drama: What was the scariest treat on TikTok? A mysterious, neon-pink condiment that arrived in the mail and defied all laws of food safety.
23. Everything Everywhere All at Once: Why was the ghost wearing googly eyes on his forehead and fighting with fanny packs? Because in some universe, we’re all just rocks with emotions.
24. The “BeReal” Notification: Why did the entire Halloween party stop at 8:14 PM? Because the notification went off, and everyone had 2 minutes to show their “authentic” (and very drunk) selves.
25. Morbius: Why did the vampire say “It’s Morbin’ Time”? He didn’t actually say it in the movie, but the internet memed it so hard they released the film twice just to watch it fail again.
26. The “Gentle” Quiet Quitting: Why was the ghost only haunting 4 hours a day? Because he was “quiet quitting” his afterlife to focus on his “ghoul-life balance.”
27. Hocus Pocus 2: Why were the Sanderson Sisters back again? Because 29 years later, they realized that Walgreens is the best place to find a new soul.
28. Black Panther: Wakanda Forever: Why was the party so blue and underwater? Because Namor arrived, and we were all mourning T’Challa while learning how to breathe under the sea.
29. The “Uncut Gems” Muse: Why was the girl talking about “Unca-Jams”? Because Julia Fox became the internet’s favorite fashion enigma and Josh Safdie’s muse.
30. Multiversus: Why was Shaggy fighting Batman? Because 2022 was the year where every character from every franchise finally decided to punch each other in the face.
31. The “Aussie” Bluey Obsession: Why were all the parents dressed as blue heelers? Because Bluey officially became the only show that both toddlers and exhausted adults could agree on.
32. Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness: Why was the witch so “Scarlet”? Because Wanda just wanted her kids, even if she had to tear through the entire Illuminati to find them.
33. The “James Webb” Space Photos: Why were the ghost’s eyes sparkling like distant galaxies? Because NASA showed us the deep universe, and our minds were officially blown.
34. The “Lizzo” Flute Moment: Why was the ghost playing a 200-year-old crystal flute? Because Lizzo proved that history is better when you add a beat and a twerk.
35. The Final 2022 Vibe: Why was it a “Spooky-Dance” Halloween? Because between Wednesday Addams and the “Corn” kid, we realized that 2022 was just one big, viral, slightly-confusing party before we moved into the unknown.