A guy sits at the bar and does the absolute bare minimum to be a customer. The bartender says, “If you’re ‘quiet quitting’ this beer, I’m ‘quietly’ taking your stool away.”
Part of the 53 Bar Jokes: The 2022 “Elon Buys Twitter & Top Gun” Edition archive. Historically Verified
🔥 Top 10: The Bar Joke Archive: 1995–2025
2024 Vintage: The Old Fashioned
Still here. Still classic. Still $18.Part of the 58 Bar Jokes: T...read more »
2025 Archive: The Last Manual Bartender
"I'm the last one who knows how to crack an egg for a sour." "Yo...read more »
2025 Archive: The Holographic Happy Hour
A guy orders a drink for his holographic girlfriend. The bartend...read more »
74 Bar Jokes: The 2001 “Odyssey & iPod Era” Edition
In 2001, the bar atmosphere changed. The Y2K fear was gone, repla...read more »
2024 Legacy: The Bar Stool
"Reserved for the person who isn't filming a TikTok."Part of the...read more »
The Sandwich Ban
When you bring your own lunch to the party.A sandwich walks into ...read more »
The Neutron Special
Science meets the social scene in this high-IQ hit.A neutron walk...read more »
2024 Classic: The Inside Out 2
A guy orders a drink for his "Anxiety." The bartender gives him ...read more »
55 Bar Jokes: The 2016 “Pokémon GO & Election” Edition
In 2016, the bar was no longer a sanctuary from the internet; it ...read more »
2024 Archive: The Gladiator II
A guy asks, "Are you not entertained?!" while eating a bowl of p...read more »
😜 More from category: The Bar Joke Archive: 1995–2025
2024 Vintage: The Furiosa
A woman with a mechanical arm and face paint orders a "V8" cockt...read more »
58 Bar Jokes: The 2024 “Eclipse, Olympics & AI Overload” Edition
In 2024, the bar became a sanctuary from a world that felt increa...read more »
2025 Classic: The Cyber-Bar
"Do you have a charger?" "For your phone, your car, your arm, or...read more »
2025 Vintage: The No-Filter Friday
A bar bans all AR glasses for one night. Everyone looks terrifie...read more »
⏳ Time Capsule: This is how we rolled in the first two decades of the internet
There is no spoon, but there is definitely a laugh here.
Better than a headshot in Complex!
The sound of my drive reading this is music to my ears.
Reticulating splines... and laughing hard!
This joke has a high clock speed! Fast and funny.
128kbps of pure comedy gold.
Shuffling... and this joke came up first!
Dead or alive, you’re laughing with me.
Challenge Accepted! I will read them all!
...Clap... Clap... Clap. Bravo!