2016 Legacy: The X-Ray
“Your ribs are fine, but there’s a Bulbasaur sitting on your liver. Oh wait, that’s just a reflection on my screen.” Part of the 69… Read More »2016 Legacy: The X-Ray
2016 Vintage: The Lemonade
Beyoncé released the album. My wife has been carrying a baseball bat and looking at my phone with extreme suspicion for three days. I’ve never… Read More »2016 Vintage: The Lemonade
2014 Vintage: The How to Train Your Dragon 2
Why was the 4th so “Scaly”? Because Hiccup and Toothless returned to prove that “Dragons are the new fireworks” for 2014. Part of the 32… Read More »2014 Vintage: The How to Train Your Dragon 2
2013 Classic: The LinkedIn “Influencer”
Why did the salesman start writing long posts about “leadership”? Because he wanted a blue badge and more “claps.” Part of the 74 Office Groaners:… Read More »2013 Classic: The LinkedIn “Influencer”
2013 Classic: The Kristen Stewart Appearance
Why was she on crutches? To prove that being a movie star is a contact sport, especially when there are photographers around. Part of the… Read More »2013 Classic: The Kristen Stewart Appearance
2013 Archive: The “Pivot to Asia”
Why was it so slow? Because the President realized that “Pivoting” is hard when your feet are stuck in a “Budget Sequestration.” Part of the… Read More »2013 Archive: The “Pivot to Asia”
2012 Legacy: The World of Warcraft “Pandaria”
Why was the IT room full of “Kung Fu Pandas”? Because the boss was busy “Zen-leveling” his monk character. Part of the 80 Office Groaners:… Read More »2012 Legacy: The World of Warcraft “Pandaria”
2012 Archive: The “Piranha 3DD” Vibe
Why was it hit? For proving that adding an extra “D” to the title doesn’t add any extra quality to the fish. Part of the… Read More »2012 Archive: The “Piranha 3DD” Vibe
2012 Archive: The Horse
I’m “stable” enough to do the dance. Part of the 134 Classic Punny One-Liners: The Apocalypse & Gangnam Style Edition (2012) archive. Historically Verified
2012 Classic: The Tech-Deck Park Upgrade
Constructing an elaborate finger-skateboard obstacle course using a stack of dictionaries and a plastic three-ring binder during quiet reading hour. Part of the 38 School… Read More »2012 Classic: The Tech-Deck Park Upgrade