2015 Vintage: Eddie Redmayne’s Energy
Why was his Best Actor win for The Theory of Everything so joyful? Because he looked like he had just been told he won a… Read More »2015 Vintage: Eddie Redmayne’s Energy
2014 Classic: The Captain America
The Winter Soldier: Why was the 4th so “Suspicious”? Because Marvel taught us that anyone—even the guy selling the fireworks—could secretly be a Hydra agent.… Read More »2014 Classic: The Captain America
2013 Classic: The Philadelphia Eagles “Chip Kelly” Era
Why was everyone running so fast? Because Chip brought “Oregon Speed” to the NFL, and the defenders were too tired to even complain about it.… Read More »2013 Classic: The Philadelphia Eagles “Chip Kelly” Era
2012 Vintage: Best R&B Song
Why “Fool for You”? Because CeeLo Green and Melanie Fiona brought the 60s soul back to the 21st century. Part of the 38 Grammy Jokes:… Read More »2012 Vintage: Best R&B Song
2012 Classic: The Map
I bought her a digital map. It started vibrating when she tried to take a “shortcut through a cornfield.” Part of the 59 Mother-in-Law Jokes:… Read More »2012 Classic: The Map
2012 Archive: The Russian “Borei-class” Submarine
Why was it finally ready? To prove that Russia can still build something that stays underwater, provided they have 15 years and a lot of… Read More »2012 Archive: The Russian “Borei-class” Submarine
2011 Archive: The Dragon Tattoo Suit
Why did the lawyer love the movie? Because he also has a tattoo, but it’s just a “dollar sign” on his heart. Part of the… Read More »2011 Archive: The Dragon Tattoo Suit
2011 Archive: The Snow
I’m “chilled” out with my new gadgets. Part of the 124 Classic Punny One-Liners: The Siri & Blocky World Edition (2011) archive. Historically Verified
2011 Archive: The “Moves Like Jagger”
Maroon 5 and Christina. I’ve been practicing the Jagger dance in my kitchen; I just look like I’m having a mild allergic reaction. Part of… Read More »2011 Archive: The “Moves Like Jagger”
2010 Archive: The Fighter Lean
Why Christian Bale? For a performance so dedicated he actually looked like he hadn’t eaten since the set of The Machinist. Part of the 40… Read More »2010 Archive: The Fighter Lean