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Home » The Work/Office Joke Archive (1995-2025) » A local United Way office realized…

A local United Way office realized…

A local United Way office realized that the organization had never received a donation from the town’s most successful lawyer. The person in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to contribute. “Our research shows that out of a yearly income of at least $500,000, you did not give a penny to charity. Wouldn’t you like to give back to the community in some way?” The lawyer mulled this over for a moment and replied, “First, did your research also show that my mother is dying after a long illness, and has medical bills that are several times her annual income?” Embarrassed, the United Way rep mumbled, “Um, no.” The lawyer interrupts, “Or that my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair?” The stricken United Way rep began to stammer out an apology, but was interrupted again. “Or that my sister’s husband died in a traffic accident,” the lawyer’s voice rising in indignation, “leaving her penniless with three children?!” The humiliated United Way rep, completely beaten, said simply, “I had no idea.” On a roll, the lawyer cut him off once again, “So if I don’t give any money to them, why should I give any to you?”

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⏳ Time Capsule: This is how we rolled in the first two decades of the internet

@CyberSteve10/18/2000 21:21Greetings from 1996! This is peak internet humor.
@Duke_Nukem_Fan08/24/2014 19:56I came here to kick ass and read jokes... and I’m all out of gum.
@Austin_Powers_Groovy08/12/1995 19:48Groovy, baby! Very groovy.
@ChatRoom_Queen11/03/2008 16:27A/S/L? Just kidding, great joke! LOL!
@Keyboard_Warrior06/15/1995 12:49F5... F5... F5... More jokes please!
@Ghostbusters_V09/06/2005 12:15Who you gonna call? Joke-busters!
@Ricky_Bobby_Fan04/12/2007 16:37Shake and bake! Hilarious!
@Web_Crawler_9605/09/2000 16:05Crawled my way to this hilarious page.
@Joe_Cartoon_G10/24/1997 18:46Press the button for more humor!
@Captain_Obvious07/26/2010 21:34This is a comment on a funny joke.

Yearly Joke Archive

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