When you don’t like the diagnosis, just ask for a compliment.
The doctor said, “You’re ugly.” I said, “I want a second opinion!” He said, “Okay, you’re also broke.”
🔥 Top 10: The Doctor Joke Archive: 1995–2025
2025 Vintage: The Prompt Doctor
My GP doesn't use a stethoscope anymore. He just whispers into hi...read more »
The Fever Logic
Applying simple math to a complex medical problem.The patient had...read more »
2025 Archive: The ChatGPT 5.0
I asked the AI for a cure for the flu. It told me to 'Turn myself...read more »
The Hospital Food
A culinary experience that makes you want to get well faster.I as...read more »
2025 Vintage: The Smart-Home Surgeon
My surgeon operated on me from a beach in Bali using a VR headset...read more »
The Memory Pill
A medical breakthrough that comes with a small side effect."Docto...read more »
A doctor and a lawyer are...
A doctor and a lawyer are talking at a party. Their conversation ...read more »
2025 Classic: The Heart
"Your pulse is fast." "I'm looking at my 'Longevity Score'!"Part ...read more »
59 Doctor Jokes: The 2009 “Swine Flu & Bitcoin Genesis” Edition
In 2009, medical humor was split between "Don't sneeze on me" and...read more »
2025 Vintage: The Ear Exam 2
"I can't hear anything." "That’s because you have 'Selective Neur...read more »
😜 More from category: The Doctor Joke Archive: 1995–2025
The Coffee Prescription
The only medicine that actually tastes good."Doctor, I have a sha...read more »
66 Doctor Jokes: The 2018 “Fortnite Dances & TikTok Birth” Edition
In 2018, medical humor focused on the "Battle Royale" of daily li...read more »
2025 Legacy: The Blood Pressure
It hit 200 when the AI said my insurance is "Statistically Improb...read more »
2025 Vintage: The MRI
"Does this machine scan for 'Digital Corruption'?" "No, just norm...read more »
⏳ Time Capsule: This is how we rolled in the first two decades of the internet
Reminds me of the good old days on the local board.
Bite my shiny metal... that is hilarious!
By the gods, this is a funny one!
Click of death? No, click of laughter!
Ignorance is bliss, but this joke is better.
Nobody fucks with the Jesus! (Great joke).
I’m kind of a big deal. People know my jokes.
Di-da-di-da-di-da-do-do! Funniest site ever!
classic. just classic. we need more of this human humor online.
this is the peak of comedy. nothing can beat this today.
lol, my brother is going to hate me for sending him this.