2019 Legacy: The Knives Out Sweaters
Why was the Dad wearing a cable-knit in July? Because Chris Evans made “looking like a rich murder suspect” the ultimate fashion goal. Part of… Read More »2019 Legacy: The Knives Out Sweaters
2018 Archive: The Mouse
I’m “clicking” with the new squad. Part of the 126 Classic Punny One-Liners: The Snap & Battle Royale Edition (2018) archive. Historically Verified
2018 Classic: Frances McDormand’s Standing O
Why did she ask every female nominee to stand up? To show the world that if you give women the microphone, they’ll use it to… Read More »2018 Classic: Frances McDormand’s Standing O
2018 Archive: The Jurassic World
Fallen Kingdom: Why did the lawyer represent the dinosaurs? To file for “asylum status” based on a “pre-existing volcanic hazard.” Part of the 45 Lawyer Jokes:… Read More »2018 Archive: The Jurassic World
2018 Legacy: Prince Harry & Meghan Markle
Why was 2018 the “Royal Wedding” year again? Because we needed to see that an American actress could become a Duchess and that a gospel… Read More »2018 Legacy: Prince Harry & Meghan Markle
2017 Classic: The James Comey Testimony
Why did everyone stay home to watch? Because it was the first time “Lordy, I hope there are tapes” became a national prayer. Part of… Read More »2017 Classic: The James Comey Testimony
2017 Archive: The Europe
Knock, knock. / Who’s there? / Europe. / Europe who? / No, Europe-an, I’m just trying to beat this level! Part of the 48 Classic… Read More »2017 Archive: The Europe
2017 Archive: The Split
I told her I have 23 different personalities. She said, “And all of them are annoying. What a coincidence.” Part of the 62 Marriage Jokes:… Read More »2017 Archive: The Split
2017 Legacy: The Coffee Bean
Why was the coffee bean so tired? It was “roasted” all day. Part of the 48 Original Dad Jokes: The 2017 “Fidget Spinner” Edition archive.… Read More »2017 Legacy: The Coffee Bean
2016 Archive: Best New Artist
Why Meghan Trainor? Because the Academy was “All About That Bass” (and maybe a little bit about those catchy hooks). Part of the 36 Grammy… Read More »2016 Archive: Best New Artist