2018 Archive: The Juice
I’m “concentrating” on the target. Part of the 126 Classic Punny One-Liners: The Snap & Battle Royale Edition (2018) archive. Historically Verified
2018 Vintage: Worst Supporting Actor
Why John Moonves? For his appearance as himself in Death of a Nation, proving that being a CEO doesn’t mean you have “it.” Part of the… Read More »2018 Vintage: Worst Supporting Actor
2018 Classic: The Final Result
I did the Floss dance in front of her parents. Her dad asked if I was having a seizure. Her mom asked for a divorce… Read More »2018 Classic: The Final Result
2016 Legacy: Beyoncé (Lemonade)
Why was every man in 2016 nervous? Because Beyoncé released an album that turned “Becky with the good hair” into public enemy number one and… Read More »2016 Legacy: Beyoncé (Lemonade)
2016 Classic: The Cubs World Series Win
Why was it a sign for 2016? Because once the Cubs won the World Series after 108 years, the universe decided that “Impossible Outcomes” were… Read More »2016 Classic: The Cubs World Series Win
2016 Vintage: Best Urban Contemporary Album
Why Beauty Behind the Madness? Because The Weeknd made “not being able to feel your face” a national pastime. Part of the 36 Grammy Jokes:… Read More »2016 Vintage: Best Urban Contemporary Album
2016 Archive: The “One Dance” Rihanna & Drake
Why was the 4th so “Tropical House”? Because Drake gave us the ultimate summer vibe for anyone holding a drink with a tiny umbrella. Part… Read More »2016 Archive: The “One Dance” Rihanna & Drake
2015 Archive: The Plum
I’ve got a “juicy” gossip from the premiere. Part of the 115 Classic Punny One-Liners: The Dress & The Force Edition (2015) archive. Historically Verified
2015 Classic: The Honorary Award for Maureen O’Hara
Why? Because it took 94 years for the Academy to realize that “The Quiet Man” had a very loud legend. Part of the 37 Oscars… Read More »2015 Classic: The Honorary Award for Maureen O’Hara
2015 Legacy: The Pizza
She told the pizza guy his car was “an insult to the neighborhood’s aesthetic.” Part of the 58 Mother-in-Law Jokes: The 2015 “Apple Watch &… Read More »2015 Legacy: The Pizza