66 Light Bulb Jokes: 2014 – The Year of the Ice Bucket Challenge

In 2014, the world was obsessed with “Breaking the Internet,” dumpings buckets of ice water on our heads for charity, and finally learning who the Guardians of the Galaxy were. It was the year of the “Everything is Awesome” anthem, the rise of the “Shmoney Dance,” and the debut of the curved TV. The humor of 2014 is high-definition, viral-friendly, and heavily influenced by the peak of the “Vine” era.

The 2014 Top 10: Viral & Galactic Brilliance

1. The Ice Bucket Challenger: One, but they have to dump a bucket of ice water on the ladder first and nominate three other people to change bulbs within 24 hours.
2. The Star-Lord (Guardians): “I come from a planet of outlaws. Billy the Kid, Bonnie and Clyde… and we always have spare 60-watts.”
3. The Groot: “I am… Bulb.”
4. The Kim Kardashian Fan: One, but they have to balance the bulb on their back while pouring champagne into a glass. #BreakTheInternet.
5. The Lego Movie Fan: “Everything is awesome! Everything is cool when your bulb is part of a team!”
6. The “Turn Down for What” Guy: One, but instead of screwing it in, they just smash through the floor while the bass drops.
7. The Pharrell Williams Fan: “Clap along if you feel like a room without a light… because I’m happy!”
8. The John Wick Fan: “I saw him change a light bulb with a pencil… a feckin’ PENCIL!”
9. The Taylor Swift (Shake It Off) Fan: “The players gonna play, play, play… and the bulbs gonna break, break, break.”
10. The Flappy Bird Addict: One, but they keep tapping the ladder too much, hit the ceiling, and have to restart the whole day.

The Full 2014 Archive (Extended List)

11. The Meghan Trainor Fan: “Because you know I’m all about that base… the light bulb base, no treble.”
12. The Sia Fan: One, but they have to do a contemporary dance while wearing a giant blonde wig that covers their eyes.
13. The Maleficent Fan: “I had wings once… they were strong… but they couldn’t reach the ceiling.”
14. The Interstellar Pilot: None. They just go into a black hole and communicate the light bulb’s location to their daughter through a bookshelf using gravity.
15. The Hozier Fan: “Take me to church… I’ll worship like a dog at the shrine of the 100-watt.”
16. The Frozen (Let It Go) Fan: “The cold (and the dark) never bothered me anyway!”
17. The Katy Perry (Dark Horse) Fan: “Are you ready for… ready for… a perfect storm of illumination?”
18. The Sam Smith Fan: “Stay with me… ’cause you’re all I need (when the light goes out).”
19. The Ed Sheeran (Thinking Out Loud) Fan: “When your legs don’t work like they used to before… use the ladder.”
20. The Iggy Azalea Fan: “I’m so fancy… you already know… I’m in the fast lane, from L.A. to Tokyo (to buy a bulb).”
21. The Mockingjay Rebel: “If we burn (out), you burn (out) with us!”
22. The “But That’s None of My Business” Frog: “I see you sitting in the dark because you’re too lazy to go to the store… but that’s none of my business.”
23. The Scientist: “We’ve landed a probe on a comet, but I still can’t find a bulb that lasts longer than a month.”
24. The Librarian: “The darkness is just a silent story waiting for a narrator.”
25. The Gym Teacher: “If you can’t reach the bulb, do 30 mountain climbers on the ladder!”
26. The Chef: “I’ll change it, but it needs to be kale-infused and artisanal.”
27. The Optimist: “This is great! Now I can finally justify buying that overpriced flashlight app.”
28. The Pessimist: “The bulb’s death is a metaphor for the entropy of the universe.”
29. The Pro-Wrestler: One, but they have to ‘Curb Stomp’ the old bulb into the trash.
30. The Detective: “The bulb was clearly unscrewed… the fingerprints belong to a ghost.”
31. The Tourist: “Is this the same light socket they use in the ‘Avengers’ movies?”
32. The Reality Producer: “Can we get the ladder to admit it’s having an affair with the stool?”
33. The Bodybuilder: “I’m not changing it, I’m ‘holding the ceiling up’ while the bulb rests.”
34. The Sailor: “A dark room is just a sea where the stars forgot to shine.”
35. The Poet: “The glass is a transparent lung that no longer breathes fire.”
36. The Bus Driver: “Move to the back! It’s dark, but I know you’re sitting on the floor!”
37. The Ghost: “I liked the old bulb. It had a more ‘uncanny’ valley feel.”
38. The 2014 Legend: One, but they do it while wearing a ‘floral print’ sweatshirt and joggers.
39. The Starbucks Fan: “One Venti-Watt, pumpkin spice, extra hot.”
40. The Maroon 5 (Sugar) Fan: “Sugar… yes please… won’t you come and put it down on me (the new bulb)?”
41. The Magic! Fan: “Why you gotta be so rude? Don’t you know the bulb is out too?”
42. The Jeremih Fan: “Don’t tell ’em… that I’m scared of the dark.”
43. The Nicki Minaj (Anaconda) Fan: “My anaconda don’t want none unless you got bulbs, hun!”
44. The Ariana Grande Fan: “I’ve got one less, one less problem… now that the light is on.”
45. The Mark Ronson (Uptown Funk) Fan: “Don’t believe me, just watch! (As I screw this in).”
46. The Big Hero 6 Fan: “On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate your darkness?”
47. The Gone Girl Fan: “I’m the Cool Girl. The Cool Girl doesn’t care if it’s dark. The Cool Girl changes her own bulbs.”
48. The Whiplash Teacher: “NOT QUITE MY WATTAGE!”
49. The Grand Budapest Hotel Guest: “One, but the bulb must be perfectly centered and pastel pink.”
50. The Nightcrawler Fan: “If you want to win the lottery, you have to make the money to buy the bulb.”
51. The Birdman Fan: One, but the whole process is filmed in a single, continuous shot.
52. The Destiny (Video Game) Player: One, but they have to shoot at a cave for three hours to get a legendary bulb.
53. The Five Nights at Freddy’s Player: None. If the power goes out, you’re already dead.
54. The Goat Simulator Fan: One, but they lick the bulb and drag it across the city while screaming.
55. The Mario Kart 8 Player: One, but they do it while driving upside down on the ceiling.
56. The 2048 Player: One, but they have to merge two 30-watt bulbs to get a 60-watt.
57. The Twitch Plays Pokemon Crowd: 50,000. They all try to screw it in at once and end up releasing the bulb into the wild.
58. The Hoverboard Rider: One, but they fall off and catch fire halfway through.
59. The Wearable Tech Geek: “My watch says my heart rate is up because I’m on a ladder!”
60. The Amazon Drone: One, but it drops the bulb on your neighbor’s roof instead.
61. The Tinder User: They just swipe left on every bulb until they find one that’s “lit.”
62. The Uber Driver: One, but they expect a 5-star rating for the “ambiance” of the dark room.
63. The Shmoney Dancer: One, but they have to throw their hat in the air and never let it come down.
64. The “Alex from Target” Fan: One, but they’re just famous for being cute while holding the bulb.
65. The Leftovers Fan: 2% of the bulbs just disappeared, and we’re all very depressed about it.
66. The 2014 Trendsetter: One, but they do it while wearing a “Coexist” bumper sticker on their laptop and drinking coconut water.