48 Travel Jokes: The 2015 “White-Gold or Blue-Black” Edition

In 2015, travel was a battle for “signal” and the perfect shot. It was the year we argued over a dress, found water on Mars, and finally saw the Force awaken after a decade of waiting. It was also the year the Apple Watch started judging our activity levels during long-haul flights.

The 2015 Top 10: The “Viral & Galactic” Classics

1. The Dress Debate: Why did the couple break up at the baggage claim? Because he saw his suitcase as blue and black, but she swore it was white and gold.
2. The Force Awakens: Why were December passengers so well-behaved? Because everyone was terrified the flight attendant would shout a Star Wars spoiler if they didn’t buckle their seatbelts.
3. The Hoverboard Ban: Why did the teenager have to leave his birthday gift at security? Because airlines decided a two-wheeled board that doesn’t actually hover is actually just a small fire bomb.
4. The Water on Mars: Why was the tourist packing flippers for a desert trip? He heard NASA found water on Mars and wanted to be the first to book a room with a “canal view.”
5. The Apple Watch: Why was the businessman jumping out of his seat every 15 minutes? Because his watch told him it was “Time to stand,” even though he was over the Atlantic.
6. The Hotline Bling: Why was the passenger in 12B making weird boxy movements with his hands? Because he was listening to Drake and trying to recreate the “invisible cell phone” dance.
7. The Jurassic World: Why were the kids at the petting zoo so disappointed? Because after the movie, they expected the goats to be eaten by a T-Rex instead of just eating their shoelaces.
8. The Mad Max: Fury Road: Why was the road trip to Vegas so intense? Because after seeing the movie, the dad felt like Immortan Joe and every gas station was a battle for “Guzzoline.”
9. The Hello – Adele: Why were there so many people crying in the terminal? Because Adele returned and forced everyone to call their exes from an international roaming plan.
10. The Periscope App: Why was the tourist filming a brick wall in vertical mode? Because Periscope made everyone want to “Go Live,” even if their only viewer was their own bot-follower.

The Full 2015 Travel Jokes Archive

11. The Left Shark: Why was the guy in the shark suit the hero of the resort? Because after the Super Bowl, anyone who got the dance moves wrong was just “doing it in style.”
12. The Selfie Stick Ban: Why was the tourist fuming at Disney? Because security confiscated his selfie stick, labeling it a “blunt force weapon” against Mickey Mouse.
13. The Fifty Shades of Grey: Why was the cabin so quiet? Because every second passenger was reading the book and no one wanted to make eye contact.
14. The Inside Out: Why was the dad crying at check-in? He claimed “Sadness” was at the controls, but we all knew it was just the price of the airport sandwich.
15. The Minions Movie: Why did every yellow suitcase trigger a panic attack? Because after the movie, Minions were on every backpack, cup, and parent’s nightmare.
16. The Fitbit Challenges: Why was the woman running laps in the hotel hallway at 11 PM? Because she needed 200 more steps to beat her co-worker in a “Weekend Warrior” challenge.
17. The Straight Outta Compton: Why was everyone wearing black hats? Because the meme allowed everyone to feel tough, even if they were “Straight Outta the Suburbs.”
18. The Witcher 3: Why did the traveler stay in the hotel room? Because The Witcher 3 came out and he’d rather slay griffins than see a local pottery museum.
19. The Windows 10: Why did the traveler’s laptop start updating at the worst possible time? Because the free upgrade didn’t ask for permission; it just took prisoners.
20. The Airbnb Growth: Why was the traveler shocked? He booked a “cozy studio” in Paris and realized he was sleeping in a broom closet with a view of a vent.
21. The Fast & Furious 7: Why was the Uber driver crying at the end of the trip? Because “See You Again” came on the radio and he started thinking about Paul Walker.
22. The Rocket Landing: Why was Elon Musk the hero of the terminal? Because SpaceX landed a rocket vertically while the tourists still couldn’t park their luggage carts straight.
23. The PewDiePie: Why were the kids in the back of the plane yelling in Swedish accents? Because they were watching a guy make millions by screaming at horror games.
24. The UberPOOL: Why did the tourist end up in a car with a cat and a clown? Because he wanted to save $3 and now had to endure a 40-minute detour.
25. The Tinder Plus: Why did the backpacker “arrive” in London three weeks early? Because he bought the Plus version and was “swiping” his way through the city from his couch in Ohio.
26. The Man Bun: Why were customs agents so suspicious? Because the “Man Bun” became so popular they couldn’t tell if the guy was a tourist or a yoga instructor.
27. The Netflix “Are you still watching?”: Why did the traveler miss the sunrise? Because Netflix asked that judgmental question at 3 AM and he clicked “Yes.”
28. The Hamilton Musical: Why was the tourist in NYC rapping about the Treasury? Because getting a ticket to Hamilton was harder than getting through a 4-hour security line.
29. The Hoverboard Explosion: Why did the hotel fire alarm go off? Because someone left their “hoverboard” charging and it decided to go full Michael Bay.
30. The Apple Watch Rings: Why was no one looking at the actual Grand Canyon? They were all checking their wrists to see if the walk from the bus closed their “Exercise Ring.”
31. The Lean On – Major Lazer: Why did every beach in 2015 sound the same? Because this song was played in every bar from Ibiza to Miami on a 24-hour loop.
32. The Martian: Why did the traveler buy a 10lb bag of potatoes? Because after seeing Matt Damon, he was convinced it was the only way to survive a budget hostel.
33. The Periscope Stream: Why was everyone looking down at their phones? Because someone was live-streaming their walk through a grocery store in Berlin and 5,000 people were watching.
34. The Instagram 1:1: Why were photographers celebrating? Because Instagram finally allowed portrait and landscape photos, and they could stop cropping their lives into squares.
35. The Dad Bod: Why were the guys on the beach so confident? Because the “Dad Bod” became an internet sensation and suddenly a beer belly was “peak fashion.”
36. The Spectre: Why did James Bond look so tired? Because saving the world in a suit that’s too tight to eat in is a lot of work for one secret agent.
37. The GoPro Session: Why did the tourist lose his camera? It was so small he mistook it for an ice cube and dropped it into his mojito.
38. The Ant-Man: Why was the passenger looking at the floor with a magnifying glass? He hoped Paul Rudd was down there helping him find his lost wireless earbud.
39. The Apple Music: Why were Taylor Swift fans confused? Because she pulled her music, then brought it back, and everyone just wanted to know if they had to pay $9.99 yet.
40. The San Andreas: Why were tourists in LA scared of sidewalk cracks? Because The Rock convinced them that if the ground shakes, they need a helicopter immediately.
41. The Hoverboard Fails: Why was YouTube full of people falling on their backs? Because everyone thought balancing on two wheels was easier than walking.
42. The Justin Bieber “Sorry”: Why did the traveler apologize to the pilot? Because the song was so catchy “Sorry” became his default answer to everything.
43. The Snapchat Lenses: Why were adults throwing up rainbows in the terminal? Because Snapchat added lenses and suddenly everyone wanted to be a dog or a flower crown.
44. The TED Talks: Why did every backpacker sound like a life coach? Because they watched three videos and were now explaining “the power of vulnerability” to the bartender.
45. The Drone Regulations: Why was the tourist’s drone grounded? Because he didn’t realize that flying over the White House was “slightly frowned upon.”
46. The Peanuts Movie: Why were adults buying kids’ tickets? They wanted to feel like children again before realizing Snoopy’s doghouse is nicer than their Airbnb.
47. The WhatsApp Web: Why did office workers look so busy? They were finally chatting about their vacation plans on their computers while pretending to work on Excel.
48. The New Year’s Eve 2016: Why was the traveler so tense? Because 2015 was a year of viral madness, and he was ready for a year where he’d spend his whole trip catching Pokémon.