Sitting perfectly still in an office chair for twenty minutes, completely mesmerized by the Windows “3D Pipes” animation, convinced it’s a live security feed from… Read More »2005 Legacy: The Windows XP Screen Saver Hypnosis
Keeping a secret compartment in a leather wallet dedicated entirely to long-distance minutes, treating them with more respect than actual government currency. Part of the… Read More »2005 Classic: The Long-Distance Card Vault
Why did the IT guy think it was a prank? He couldn’t imagine a world where you’d never have to delete an email again. Part… Read More »2004 Classic: The Gmail 1GB Storage
Arriving at the commercial shopping center entrance doors at 5:45 AM in matching neon tracksuits to complete five brisk laps before the security guards unlock… Read More »2003 Legacy: The Mall Walker Dawn Patrol
I’m a pant. I’m just “holding” on. Part of the 112 Classic Punny One-Liners: The Euro-Spider Edition (2002) archive. Historically Verified
Why Tom Green? For proving that winning 5 Razzies the previous year didn’t mean he was going to stop trying to win more. Part of… Read More »2002 Archive: The “Stealing Harvard” Joke
Why did J.Lo get married in 2001? Because she was “Real” and “In Love,” and she needed someone to help her carry all the jewelry… Read More »2001 Archive: Jennifer Lopez & Cris Judd
Why did we toast to the stars? Because the old space station finally fell into the ocean, marking the end of an era and the… Read More »2001 Vintage: The Mir Space Station (Deorbit)
Why was it ending? Because Tim Duncan was the future and David Robinson was the history, and the torch was being passed in the most… Read More »2001 Vintage: The San Antonio Spurs “Twin Towers” Farewell
The copper mug makes a comeback. A guy asks, “Can I get a signal on this thing?” Part of the 67 Bar Jokes: The 2000… Read More »2000 Classic: The Moscow Mule
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