50 Travel Jokes: The 2002 “Euro Cash & Spider-Man” Edition

In 2002, travel felt a bit more “unified” in Europe, but a lot more complicated everywhere else. You were getting used to taking off your shoes at security, trying to figure out if your Nokia could handle a 160-character MMS, and wondering why everyone in the hostel was suddenly talking about “The Shire.”

The 2002 Top 10: The “New Currency” Classics

1. The Euro Swap: Why was the American tourist confused in Italy? He spent two hours trying to pay with Lira, only to be told that his money was now officially “souvenirs” and he needed “the Monopoly-colored cash” instead.
2. The MMS Fail: Why did the traveler spend $20 on one photo? Because he tried to send a 20-kilobyte MMS of the Eiffel Tower and his roaming bill felt like he’d bought the actual tower.
3. The Spider-Man Craze: Why was the kid climbing the hotel walls? Because the first movie just came out and he was convinced the “Continental Breakfast” gave him radioactive spider powers.
4. The Nokia 7650: Why did the businessman look like he was from the future? He had the first Nokia with a built-in camera, even though the photos looked like they were taken through a thick fog.
5. The Low-Cost Explosion: Why was the passenger sitting on his own lap? Because he booked a $1 flight and realized “legroom” was an optional extra that cost $50.
6. The Ronaldo Haircut: Why did every kid at the resort look so weird? Because their dads gave them the “Ronaldo 2002” half-shaved haircut, making the beach look like a convention for unfinished haircuts.
7. The MySpace Tease: Why was the backpacker in the internet cafe? He heard rumors of a site called “MySpace” and wanted to see if he could finally have more “friends” than the guy in the bunk above him.
8. The Minority Report: Why was the traveler paranoid at the airport? He’d seen the Tom Cruise movie and was waiting for the billboards to start talking to him and scanning his eyeballs.
9. The Xbox Live: Why did the teenager refuse to go to the beach? Because Xbox Live just launched and he’d rather “travel” to a virtual battlefield than see a real sunset.
10. The Bourne Identity: Why was the tourist acting so suspicious? Because he watched Matt Damon and now believed his “Economy Class” ticket was actually a cover for his life as a sleeper agent.

The Full 2002 Travel Jokes Archive

11. The Euro Coins: Why was the traveler’s pocket so heavy? Because he was collecting a different coin from every country in Europe like they were Pokémon.
12. The Kelly Clarkson Song: Why was everyone singing at the gate? Because A Moment Like This was on every radio and everyone felt like they were winning American Idol while boarding.
13. The Blackberry 5810: Why was the executive frustrated? He had a Blackberry that could finally make calls, but only if he plugged in a headset that made him look like a telemarketer.
14. The Star Wars Episode II: Why was the desert tour so disappointing? Because the fans realized that “Attack of the Clones” involved way more sand than they were prepared for.
15. The iPod Storage: Why was the traveler smug? He upgraded to the 10GB iPod and now had enough music to fly to the moon and back without hearing the same song twice.
16. The DVD Camcorder: Why was the dad so stressed? He bought a camcorder that recorded directly to mini-DVDs, and he spent the whole trip terrified he’d scratch the only copy of the “Disney Parade.”
17. The 802.11b Wi-Fi: Why was the businessman sitting in the hotel hallway? Because the “High Speed Wi-Fi” signal only existed within 3 feet of the router near the elevator.
18. The Nickelback Flight: Why was the passenger crying? Not because of the turbulence, but because How You Remind Me played four times during the 2-hour delay.
19. The Scooby-Doo Movie: Why were the kids looking for ghosts in the hotel? Because they’d seen the live-action movie and were convinced the concierge was actually a monster in a mask.
20. The GPRS Bill: Why did the traveler lose his house? He used GPRS to check the weather in London and the data roaming fees were higher than his mortgage.
21. The Segway Debut: Why was the tourist laughing? He saw a guy on a “Segway” and thought it was a prop from a failed sci-fi movie instead of the “future of transportation.”
22. The Harry Potter 2: Why were people avoiding the hotel plumbing? Because The Chamber of Secrets came out and everyone was afraid Moaning Myrtle was hiding in the toilet.
23. The Windows XP SP1: Why was the laptop working? Because Service Pack 1 finally stopped it from crashing every time the traveler tried to connect to a hotel printer.
24. The Bluetooth Headset: Why did the traveler look like he was talking to himself? Because the blue blinking light on his ear was so small people thought he was having a solo argument.
25. The Two Towers: Why did the hikers go to New Zealand? Because they wanted to find the “One Ring,” but all they found was a lot of sheep and expensive coffee.
26. The Sony Ericsson T68i: Why was the teenager so popular? He had the phone with the “Add-on Camera” that clicked into the bottom like a piece of high-tech jewelry.
27. The Digital Photo Print: Why did the traveler wait at the kiosk? He was trying to print a 2-megapixel photo and the machine was processing it like it was a blueprint for a skyscraper.
28. The Eminem Show: Why was the plane so angry? Because every passenger under 25 was listening to Without Me and feeling “rebellious” in Row 22.
29. The Travel Website: Why did the man book a “Surprise Trip”? Because a new website told him it was cheaper, and he ended up in a town that wasn’t on the map.
30. The Airline Security: Why was the man in his socks? Because 2002 was the year “Shoe Removal” became the most popular sport at the airport.
31. The USB 128MB: Why did the student feel rich? Because he had a 128MB flash drive and felt like he could store the entire internet on his keychain.
32. The Catch Me If You Can: Why was the passenger checking the pilot’s ID? Because Leo made being a fake pilot look so easy that no one trusted a uniform anymore.
33. The Hotel Minibar: Why was the water so expensive? Because in 2002, hotels realized that a thirsty traveler would pay $6 for a bottle of “Artisan Spring Water” from a tap.
34. The Las Ketchup: Why were the flight attendants dancing? Because The Ketchup Song was the only way to keep the passengers from complaining about the 4-hour delay.
35. The PDA Phone: Why was the traveler confused? He had a Handspring Treo and couldn’t decide if he was holding a computer, a phone, or a very expensive brick.
36. The Austin Powers 3: Why was the customs agent saying “Goldmember”? Because 2002 was the year everyone’s sense of humor was stuck in a “Groovy” time loop.
37. The Discman Final Stand: Why was the man clinging to his CD player? Because he didn’t trust “digital files” and liked the feeling of a physical disk skipping during a landing.
38. The Room Service: Why was the burger cold? Because the hotel was “modernizing” its kitchen and the computer system forgot that Room 402 existed.
39. The No Doubt Song: Why was the traveler feeling “Hella Good”? Because the beat was catchy and he’d just found a 5-Euro note on the floor.
40. The Laptop Heat: Why did the traveler have a burned lap? Because his 2002 laptop ran so hot it could be used to grill a panini during the flight.
41. The 3G License: Why was the telecom CEO crying? Because he just spent 30 billion dollars on a 3G license and the traveler was still only using his phone to play Snake.
42. The 28 Days Later: Why was the London tourist scared? Because the movie made every empty street look like a zombie apocalypse was about to start.
43. The Tablet PC: Why did the traveler look frustrated? He had the first Windows Tablet and spent the whole flight trying to get the pen to click “Close.”
44. The Duty Free Toblerone: Why was it so big? Because 2002 logic said that if you’re using Euros, you might as well buy 2 kilos of honey-almond nougat.
45. The Seat Pitch: Why did the man have his knees in his chin? Because “Low Cost” airlines started experimenting with the idea that humans don’t actually need legs.
46. The Video Rental: Why did the traveler miss his flight? He was at the Blockbuster returning Shrek because the late fees were now higher than the airfare.
47. The Tamagotchi Connection: Why was the kid happy? Because the new Tamagotchis could “connect,” which meant his virtual pet had more of a social life than he did.
48. The Passport Photo: Why did the man look like a criminal? Because 2002 was the year they switched to “Digital Passport Photos” and the resolution made everyone look like a mugshot.
49. The Currency Exchange: Why was the booth empty? Because the Euro made the “Exchange Bureau” as useful as a VHS player in a DVD world.
50. The New Year’s Eve: Why were people happy? Because it was the first year in a decade we didn’t have to worry about a “Millennium Bug” or a currency change.