41 Presidential Jokes: The 2008 “Yes We Can & Financial Meltdown” Edition

In 2008, the American Presidency was a roller coaster that ran out of track. It was the year of “Hope and Change,” the year Wall Street became a “Main Street” nightmare, and the year we learned that a size 10 shoe is surprisingly aerodynamic when thrown at a world leader.

The 2008 Executive Top 10: “Hope & Hard Times”

1. The Shoe-Throwing Incident: Why did George W. Bush have such good reflexes in Baghdad? Because after eight years of dodging questions from the press, dodging a flying shoe was just another day at the office.
2. The Obama “Yes We Can” Landslide: Why was the slogan so effective? Because after the 2008 economy crashed, “No We Can’t” was already the official response from every bank in America.
3. The Sarah Palin “I Can See Russia” Quote: Why was the 2008 VP race so entertaining? Because for a few months, Americans weren’t sure if they were watching the news or an extended episode of Saturday Night Live.
4. The Lehman Brothers Collapse: Why was Wall Street so quiet in September? Because it’s hard to make noise when your “Golden Parachute” turns out to be an anvil.
5. The $700 Billion Bailout: Why did the government give so much money to banks? Because “Too Big to Fail” is just a fancy way of saying “We lost your lunch money and need a refill.”
6. The John McCain “Fundamentals” Gaffe: Why did McCain say the economy was “strong” in the middle of a crash? Because when you’ve survived a POW camp, a 500-point drop in the Dow just feels like a light breeze.
7. The Fist Bump Heard ‘Round the World: Why was the Obama “Terrorist Press Conference Fist Bump” a thing? Because Fox News spent a week trying to decide if it was a greeting or a secret code for “Change.”
8. The Hillary “3 A.M. Phone Call” Ad: Why did it backfire? Because in 2008, most Americans were already awake at 3 A.M. wondering how they were going to pay their mortgages.
9. The Lipstick on a Pig Quote: Why was the 2008 campaign so metaphorical? Because both parties realized that if they talked about actual math, the voters would just start crying.
10. The Election Night in Grant Park: Why was 2008 so emotional? Because for one night, America believed that a “Bridge to the 21st Century” had finally been finished—and it was built on “Hope.”

The Full 2008 Presidential Jokes Archive

11. The $4 Gas Price: Why was the President so unpopular in the summer? Because “Texas Oilman” is a great title until it costs $100 to fill up a minivan.
12. The “Joe the Plumber” Phenomenon: Why was a guy with a wrench the star of the debates? To prove that in 2008, everyone was one “tax hike” away from becoming a political consultant.
13. The Beijing Olympics: Why was Bush so happy at the opening ceremony? Because it was the only time in 2008 he was surrounded by people who were supposed to be running in circles.
14. The Bernie Madoff Scandal: Why was he the villain of the year? Because he proved that the only thing more fake than a campaign promise was a 2008 investment portfolio.
15. The “Maverick” Branding: Why did McCain love that word? Because “Longtime Senator” sounds like part of the problem, but “Maverick” sounds like a guy who’d fix your car for free.
16. The iPhone 3G Launch: Why did it change the election? Because for the first time, you could watch a candidate’s gaffe in high resolution while waiting for the bus.
17. The Dark Knight Premiere: Why did D.C. love the Joker? Because his “chaos” was still more organized than the federal response to the housing crisis.
18. The First Presidential Debate Delay: Why did McCain want to “suspend” his campaign? Because “The economy is crashing” is the ultimate “The dog ate my homework” excuse.
19. The Tina Fey Effect: Why was Sarah Palin so famous? Because Tina Fey did such a good job that people forgot which one was the actual governor of Alaska.
20. The “Bitter” Gate: Why did Obama mention “Guns and Religion”? To prove that even a Harvard law graduate can occasionally say exactly what he’s thinking at the worst possible time.
21. The $150,000 Wardrobe: Why was the RNC buying clothes for Palin? Because “Reform” looks better when it’s wearing high-end designer labels.
22. The Iron Man Release: Why did it resonate? Because in 2008, we all wanted a billionaire in a suit to solve our problems—preferably one who didn’t work for Goldman Sachs.
23. The G-20 Emergency Summit: Why did world leaders meet in D.C.? To compare notes on whose ATM machines were going to stop working first.
24. The “Celebrity” Ad: Why did McCain compare Obama to Paris Hilton? Because they both had more fans than policy papers, and they both looked better in sunglasses.
25. The Bill Clinton “Fairy Tale” Quote: Why was Bill so grumpy in 2008? Because he realized that “The First Black President” title was about to be officially revoked by a guy from Hawaii.
26. The Detroit Auto Bailout: Why did the “Big Three” fly private jets to ask for money? To show Congress that they were “economical” with everything except their own comfort.
27. The “Yes We Carried” Success: Why was the ground game so big? Because in 2008, the Democrats realized that a “Text Message” was more powerful than a “Town Hall.”
28. The Florida Primary Chaos: Why did it happen again? Because Florida wouldn’t be Florida if they didn’t try to make the election as complicated as a crossword puzzle in the rain.
29. The “That One” Debate Moment: Why did McCain call Obama “That One”? Because after 20 months of campaigning, “Barack” was just too many syllables to deal with.
30. The Facebook Election: Why was 2008 the “Social Media Year”? Because it was the first time your crazy uncle could ruin Thanksgiving dinner three weeks early on your “Wall.”
31. The Kosovo Independence: Why was the White House supportive? Because after Iraq, they really needed a “Regime Change” that involved more flowers and fewer IEDs.
32. The Indiana Jones 4 Release: Why did it fail? Because 2008 was a year where “Old Heroes returning to find their legacy in ruins” was too close to the evening news.
33. The Large Hadron Collider Power-Up: Why were people scared? Because a “Black Hole” in Switzerland felt safer than the “Black Hole” in the U.S. Treasury.
34. The “Kitchen Table” Issues: Why did politicians use that phrase? Because most Americans were actually hiding under their kitchen tables by October.
35. The Rev. Jeremiah Wright Tapes: Why was the campaign in crisis? To remind everyone that “Hope” usually comes with a lot of “Unfiltered YouTube Footage” from the past.
36. The “Community Organizer” Jibe: Why did Republicans mock it? Because they didn’t realize that “Organizing a Community” is exactly what you need to do to win an election in the digital age.
37. The Transition of Power: Why was Bush so helpful to Obama? Because he was the only person in the world who knew how much the “New Job” was actually going to suck.
38. The “Lame Duck” Finale: Why did Bush stay busy? To prove that he was going to keep “Deciding” until the very last second the moving truck pulled up.
39. The “Birther” Rumors Begin: Why did they start in 2008? To prove that in American politics, if you can’t beat someone’s “Hope,” you just question their “Home.”
40. The Craigslist Growth: Why did it explode in ’08? Because after the crash, everyone was trying to sell their “Limited Edition Campaign Buttons” for grocery money.
41. The Final 2008 Vibe: Why was it “Historical”? Because we ended the year with the first African-American President-elect, a broken bank account, and a very clear feeling that the 90s were officially, finally over.