42 Musician & Rock Star Jokes: The 2013 “Get Lucky, Pure Heroine & The Wrecking Ball” Edition

In 2013, the pop world went from minimal to maximal in a heartbeat. Two French robots teamed up with Pharrell to bring disco back, a teenager from New Zealand named Lorde told us we’d “never be royals,” and Miley Cyrus decided to ride a piece of construction equipment into a new era of her career. It was the year of the “Harlem Shake” videos, the surprise Beyoncé drop that changed how albums are released, and the moment we realized that “Happy” was going to be played in every grocery store for the next decade.

The 2013 Soundboard Top 10: “Get Lucky, Royals & The Surprise Drop”

1. The Daft Punk “Get Lucky” Summer: Why the disco helmets? Because the robots spent the whole summer “up all night to get lucky,” proving that a Nile Rodgers riff is the most powerful force in the universe.
2. The Lorde “Pure Heroine” Arrival: Why the black lipstick? Because a 16-year-old from Auckland arrived to tell the music industry that their diamonds and gold teeth were boring, making “Royals” the anthem of every relatable kid.
3. The Miley Cyrus “Wrecking Ball” Impact: Why the tears? Because Miley officially ended her Disney era by swinging into our lives, twerking at the VMAs, and making foam fingers a national controversy.
4. The Beyoncé Self-Titled Surprise: Why the midnight drop? Because Queen B released a “visual album” with zero promotion, proving that she doesn’t need a marketing team—she just needs to press “upload.”
5. The Pharrell Williams “Happy” Phenomenon: Why the giant hat? Because Pharrell created a song so infectious it made everyone feel like a room without a roof, even if we were stuck in traffic.
6. The Robin Thicke “Blurred Lines” Scandal: Why the legal battle? For the song that was the biggest hit of the year until everyone actually listened to the lyrics and the Marvin Gaye estate called their lawyers.
7. The Kanye West “Yeezus” Chaos: Why the screaming? Because Kanye decided to make an industrial, minimalist nightmare of an album that proved he was more interested in being an architect than a pop star.
8. The Arctic Monkeys “AM” Coronation: Why the slicked-back hair? Because Alex Turner and the boys traded the Sheffield grit for Dr. Dre beats and leather jackets, creating the ultimate late-night rock record.
9. The Katy Perry vs. Lady Gaga Battle: Why “Roar” vs. “Applause”? Because the two pop titans released singles at the same time, turning August into a gladiatorial arena for pop fans.
10. The Avicii “Wake Me Up” Blend: Why the banjo and EDM? Because Avicii proved that you could mix country folk with a Swedish house beat and conquer every festival on the planet.

The Full 2013 Musician & Rock Star Archive

11. The Macklemore “Can’t Hold Us” Peak: Why the high energy? For the independent rappers who spent 2013 proving that The Heist was the biggest success story of the year.
12. The Vampire Weekend “Modern Vampires of the City”: Why the black-and-white cover? For the band maturing into the kings of indie-pop with songs about time and religion.
13. The Justin Timberlake “The 20/20 Experience”: Why the suit and tie? For JT returning after 7 years to prove that he and Timbaland still had the magic for 8-minute pop songs.
14. The Drake “Nothing Was the Same”: Why the baby face? For the “Started from the Bottom” anthem that soundtracked every minor achievement in 2013.
15. The Eminem “The Marshall Mathers LP 2”: Why the blond hair again? For the return of Slim Shady and the “Rap God” verse that made every other rapper feel like they were standing still.
16. The Bastille “Pompeii”: Why the “Eh-eh-o”? For the song that made every indie-pop fan feel like their walls were tumbling down in a very catchy way.
17. The Paramore Self-Titled Rebirth: Why the “Ain’t It Fun”? For Hayley Williams and the crew finding their groove and winning a Grammy for their most colorful sound yet.
18. The Haim “Days Are Gone” Debut: Why the three sisters? For the band that brought 70s rock harmonies and 90s R&B rhythms together to be the coolest thing in California.
19. The One Direction “Midnight Memories”: Why the rock-pop shift? For the boys proving they could sound like Mumford & Sons (sort of) and still make 10 million people scream.
20. The Queens of the Stone Age “…Like Clockwork”: Why the dark mood? For Josh Homme returning from the brink of death to make the most beautiful and heavy album of his career.
21. The Arcade Fire “Reflektor”: Why the paper-mache masks? For the band teaming up with James Murphy to make a 75-minute dance-rock odyssey.
22. The Lana Del Rey “The Great Gatsby”: Why “Young and Beautiful”? For the song that made every party feel like it was the summer of 1922 and things were about to go very wrong.
23. The Fall Out Boy “Save Rock and Roll”: Why the comeback? For the band returning from hiatus with a pop-heavy sound and a guest spot from Elton John.
24. The Imagine Dragons “Night Visions” (Peak): Why “Radioactive”? For the song that was so big it literally wouldn’t leave the Billboard charts for 87 weeks.
25. The Disclosure “Settle” Breakthrough: Why the face outlines? For the brothers who made UK house music cool again for a whole new generation.
26. The Janelle Monáe “The Electric Lady”: Why the Prince feature? For the queen of soul-funk proving she was the chosen one by the legends themselves.
27. The David Bowie “The Next Day” Surprise: Why the return from silence? For the legend dropping a masterpiece on his birthday after everyone thought he had retired.
28. The Nine Inch Nails “Hesitation Marks”: Why the “Came Back Haunted”? For Trent Reznor proving that industrial rock still had plenty of teeth in 2013.
29. The Bruno Mars “Unorthodox Jukebox”: Why “When I Was Your Man”? For the man who could switch from 80s rock to a heartbreaking piano ballad without messing up his hair.
30. The Panic! At The Disco “Too Weird to Live…”: Why the Vegas vibe? For Brendon Urie going full synth-pop and glitter to celebrate his hometown.
31. The Savages “Silence Yourself”: Why the all-black outfits? For the post-punk band that proved intensity and volume were still the best ways to get attention.
32. The James Blake “Overgrown”: Why the Mercury Prize? For the man who turned electronic music into a haunting, soulful experience that made everyone lean in.
33. The Pearl Jam “Lightning Bolt”: Why the return? For the Seattle legends proving they could still strike with raw energy 20 years into their career.
34. The CHVRCHES “The Bones of What You Believe”: Why the synth-pop? For the Scottish trio proving that clean melodies and sharp lyrics were the perfect 2013 combo.
35. The Childish Gambino “Because the Internet”: Why the screenplay? For Donald Glover proving he was a multi-media genius who understood the digital world better than anyone.
36. The Phoenix “Bankrupt!”: Why the colorful sound? For the French band following up their success with an even weirder and brighter pop record.
37. The Death of Lou Reed: Why the “Walk on the Wild Side” finale? For the loss of the man who gave rock its edge, its darkness, and its poetry.
38. The Death of Jeff Hanneman: Why the Slayer silence? For the loss of the riff-master behind “Raining Blood,” leaving a hole in the heart of metal.
39. The Ylvis “What Does The Fox Say?”: Why the question? For the comedy duo that accidentally created the most annoying and viral song of the entire year.
40. The Harlem Shake Trend: Why the helmet? For the 30-second meme that made everyone from grandmas to the Norwegian army look like they were having a seizure on camera.
41. The Vine App Peak: Why 6 seconds? For the platform that created a whole new generation of stars and changed how we consumed music one loop at a time.
42. The 2013 Final Music Vibe: Why did the year feel so transitional? Because of the surprise Beyoncé drop, the rise of Vine stars, and the Daft Punk disco helmets that made us feel like we were dancing on a Wrecking Ball while waiting to become Royals.